The Best 44 Accord Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Accord jokes. There are some accord jakarta jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these accord agree puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Accord Jokes and Puns

My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic

I refused. If I'm going to have sex, its going to be on my own Accord

What's the earliest joke you can remember? Here's mine:

These two:

"My wife went to the West Indies"
"Jamaica?"
"No, she went of her own accord."

"My wife went to the East Indies"
"Jakarta?"
"No, she went by plane."

Did you hear the CEO of Honda wont be back next year?

He's leaving of his own accord.

Accord joke, Did you hear the CEO of Honda wont be back next year?

Proof that Jesus and his disciples were all Mexicans...

It says in the Bible that they all traveled in one accord!

An accordion player goes to a bar... (warning: dumb joke)

After a long night at performing at a local restaurant, an accordion player goes to have a few late night drinks. He drives up to the bar and goes inside. After finishing his first drink, he realizes he left his car unlocked! He rushed outside, opened the trunk of his car.....but it was too late....a 2nd accordion was already there!


How is an accordion like an artillery shell?

Once you hear it, it's already too late.

Accordion to a recent survey, most people don't notice when a musical instrument is inserted into a sentence.

Accord joke, Accordion to a recent survey, most people don't notice when a musical instrument is inserted into a

My girlfriend and I were fighting in the car

We glared at eachother and I thought neither of us would back down, but in the end we struck an Accord.

A guy pulled up next to me in his Honda on a scorching day....

.... and asked if he could fry and egg on the hood of my black car on a dare.

I looked back at him incredulously and said "Why not do it on your own Accord?"

An accordion player walks into a bar,

orders a drink and chats up the bartender and the regulars for an hour.

Suddenly, he realizes that not only has he left his instrument in his back seat of his car in full view of passers-by, but he hasn't even locked his doors.

He quickly excuses himself from his conversation and rushes outside and up the block to his vehicle to take care of business, but it was too late.

Sure enough, someone had thrown another accordion in his back seat.

What do you get when you wreck a Honda Accord into a Saturn Ion?

An Accordion.

...I'll, uh, see myself out.

You can explore accord civic reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean accord pact dad jokes. There are also accord puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Did you hear about that guy who was crushed by his Honda?

Police say he died of his own Accord.

Did you know?

Accordion to a recent study, 90% of the world don't realise when a word has been swapped with an instrument.

Jesus drove a Honda, but nobody knew about it.

For I did not speak of my own accord. - John 12:49

What kind of car does Jesus drive? A Christler. Oh no. Wait..

He drove a Honda.
But he didn't like talking about it.

John 12:49 :
> For I did not speak of my own Accord.

Everyone is worried Trump will pull us out of The Paris Accord...

But Trump doesn't know how to pull out, that is why he has 10 kids.

Accord joke, Everyone is worried Trump will pull us out of The Paris Accord...

Accordion to studies...

Most people don't replace the first word of a sentence with an instrument

My girlfriend tried to get me to have sex with her on the hood of her Honda Civic...

I told her if I was gonna have sex, it would have to be on my own Accord

Accordion to scientific studies, 90% ..

of people do not realise I replaced the beginning of this joke with a musical instrument.


The White House informs its supporters it is pulling out of the Paris accord.

It was the most difficult 4 phone calls they ever made.

Trump has left the historical Paris Climate Accord in which countries around the world agreed to fight global warming...

It was the first time he pulled out of a working model.

Accordion to a recent survey...

Most people don't notice when words are swapped for instruments in sentences.

My boyfriend and I both drive Hondas.

He's got one of those boxy ones, and mine is a mid-size sedan. And neither of us has our own place, so we mostly end up just having sex inside the car. His is a little bigger, so we usually use his.

Recently, however, he's been wanting to experiment a little bit, and he's saying we should try some things out while having sex on top of his car, instead of inside it.

But if I'm gonna have sex with my boyfriend in a way that's out of his Element, it will have to be on my own Accord.

What kind of car did Jesus drive?

He and his disciples were together in one Accord.

There was an accordion player

He was going out for a drink after a show with his friend and was nervous about leaving his instrument in the car as he didn't want to get it stolen. His friend told him it was alright and nobody would try to steal an accordion. After a night of drinking they walk back to the car and notice a window is broken. The musician is mad at his friend for letting him leave the instrument until they get to the car and find two accordions.

I was going to ask my friend what kind of car he drives

But he told me of his own accord

My girlfriend keeps pressuring me...

My girlfriend keeps pressuring me to have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic.

I told her, "No thanks, we'll do it on my own Accord."

In the bible, Jesus says "for I do not speak of my own accord." I guess he drove a honda but just didn't like to talk about it

I always thought he drove a christler

The Bible says you can fit 12 men in a Honda.

All the disciples were in one Accord.

I was chatting with my coworker about cars last week and I was gonna ask him what kind of car he had...

Before I could, he told me of his own accord.

Accordion to studies, its very easy to hide musical instruments in every day sentences.

I find that harp to belive though.

Accordion to a study done by Stanford University, 9 out 10 people don't notice when words are substituted for music instruments

hehe

My Nookie Days Are Over

My nookie days are over, my pilot light is out.

What used to be my sex appeal, is now my waterspout.

Time was when, on its own accord, from my trousers it would spring,

But now I've got a full-time job, to find the blasted thing.

It used to be embarrassing, the way it would behave.

For every single morning, it would stand and watch me shave.

Now as old age approaches, it sure gives me the blues,

to see it hang its little head, and watch me tie my shoes!

My boyfriend wanted us to have sex on the hood of his Honda Civic, but I refused.

If I'm ever going to have sex, it's going to be on my own Accord.

Every since I divorced my wife life has been so much better

Turns out I really enjoy living in my own Accord

Accordion to a recent survey, inserting musical instruments into sentences largely goes unnoticed.

Read it slowly.

I thought someone stole my car keys, I looked for hours and was convince someone had grabbed them, later on I felt so stupid because I left them on top of my car

Turns out I lost them on my own accord

Jesus' apostles were Mexican...

...Because there were twelve of them who traveled in an accord.

If Jesus drove a car, what kind would it be?

A CHRYSLER! He also had a Honda, but never told anybody for he does not speak of his own Accord.

My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic…

But I refused.

If I'm going to have sex, it's going to be on my own Accord.

Two cockney men were talking...

The first one says "So my wife sailed to the West Indies last year". The other one asks "Jamaica?". The first man answers "No, she went on her own accord".

Did you know that Jesus had a Honda, but never talked about it?

For I did not speak of my own accord
-John 12:49a

My Honda Accord was rear-ended by a truck.

Now it's a Honda Accordion.

How do you tie two Hondas together?

...with Accord

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the accord honda jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working accord deal piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes