The Best 9 Accomplishments Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Accomplishments jokes. There are some accomplishments contributions jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these accomplishments events puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Accomplishments Jokes and Puns

My best friend swore up and down that he would stop taking credit for my accomplishments.

Then today he called me to brag that he got his wife pregnant.

In high school I was voted Most Likely to Lie About Past Accomplishments.

It's true...

Interviewer: Name one of your accomplishments

Applicant:Well I discovered aliens, outside my house and managed to learn their language.
Interviewer:That seems rather complicated...
Applicant:Well Spanish isn't hard to learn sir.

Three insurance salesmen, Al, Ben, and Carl, are bragging about their accomplishments.

"Last month," says Al, "when one of my insured died suddenly, I got the news within six hours. The next day, I put a check in the mail for his family."

"That's nothing," says Ben. "Last week, when one of my insured died suddenly, I got the news within 30 minutes. That very day, I personally delivered a check to his family."

"Amateurs," says Carl. "Yesterday, one of my insured was fixing the roof of my office building when he fell off the roof. I handed him his check when he passed my window."

I'm sick and tired of those who say Hillary has no great accomplishments....

I would say staying out of prison for the crimes she committed in the last four decades is a great accomplishment.


Congratulations on your accomplishments!

Whitney Houston, on being year sober!

Teacher: Who has impressed you the most by their accomplishments?

Me: Donald Trump. I can't believe he's made it so far

Accomplishments joke, Teacher: Who has impressed you the most by their accomplishments?

Why does Middle Eastern civilization have no major accomplishments?

It's too sunni for physical labour and everyone has shi'ite for brains.

How does visiting Australia help a virgin's list of accomplishments?

It's the quickest way to Adelaide to it.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the accomplishments impressive jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working accomplishments decades piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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