Accommodation Jokes

7 accommodation jokes and hilarious accommodation puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about accommodation that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful Accommodation Jokes

What is a good accommodation joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

What do you call a punctuation mark that's got a girlfriend?


Super bowl tickets

A buddy of mine has two tickets for the 2017 Super Bowl. Box seats plus airfare, accommodation, etc., but he didn't realize when he bought them that this is going to be on the same day as his wedding - so he can't go.
If you're interested and want to go instead of him, it's at St. Peter's Church, in New York City, at 5 p.m. Her name's Louise. She's 5' 6", about 120 lbs., good cook, makes $130,000 a year! She will be the one in the white dress."
*this was forwarded to me by my dad just now, never heard before, thought was worthwhile for a chuckle.

The first Jewish President of the United States is elected.

The night before the inauguration he calls his mother.
"Mom, I'd love for you to come visit and stay with me during the inauguration and for a few days."
"Oh I don't know, airfare is so expensive these days."
"Mom, I'll fly you out on Air Force One!"
"Oh, but you know, cab fare is ridiculous."
"Mom, the Presidential motorcade will drive you here."
"But accommodations, especially during the inau---"
"MOM!! I'll put you in the Lincoln bedroom itself!!"
She reluctantly agrees, hangs up and starts talking to her friend.
"Who was that?"
"My son."
*gasp* "The doctor??"
"No, the other one."

Wanted: Personal psychic for wealthy client.

Salary: $10,000 per week plus bonuses.
Free accommodation.
10 weeks paid leave per year.
Company car.
Generous pension scheme.
You know where to apply.

A Chinese pan, an establishment for accommodation and drinks, a number, and Abraham Rockefeller...

Wok inn two Abe R.

Wanna hear a funny word?

Re-accommodate. lol

At the end of my 21st birthday meal, I mentioned to my dad that the waiter had been really friendly and accommodating.

So he hands him a 100 euro note and goes, "As the l**... said to the p**..., 'You can keep the tip!'"

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