Accidentally Jokes

Do you love to make people laugh but are worried that you may accidentally cross a line or offend someone? This article explores the differences between accidentally jokes, deliberately jokes, and jokes that are mysteriously funny. Find out how to tell the difference and help you stay on the right track!

Great Accidentally Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends

TIFU by accidentally cheating on my wife at a BDSM convention with a woman who was wearing the same leather mask

Whoops, wrong sub

If Queen Elizabeth accidentally farts during dinner, the other guests are supposed to pretend like nothing happened.

Noble gases should have no reaction.

During a funeral...

The pallbearers accidentally bump into a wall and hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find out that the woman is actually alive.
She lives for 10 more years and then dies. There is another funeral for her. At the end of the service, the pallbearers carry out the casket.
As they are walking out, the husband cries out, "Watch out for the wall!"

I accidentally locked my keys in my car in front of an abortion clinic...

They gave me the dirtiest look when I went in and asked to borrow a coathanger.

jokes about accidentally

I accidentally gave my girlfriend a glue stick instead of chapstick...

She's still not talking to me :(

Why did the sperm cross the road?

I accidentally put on the wrong sock this morning.

I accidentally rear ended someone at a stop light while not paying attention..

We get out to exchange information, and I notice the guy is a midget. The first thing he says is, "I'm not happy." To which I replied, "Well which one are you then?"

Accidentally joke, I accidentally rear ended someone at a stop light while not paying attention..

North Korean submarine accidentally destroys another North Korean submarine

Woops, wrong sub

I accidentally flogged another dominatrix's client.

Oops, wrong sub.

TIL in 1974 Russians accidentally blew up their own submarine, thinking it was an enemy

Oops, wrong sub

I accidentally called out my mums name during sex

and my sister hasn't talked to me since.

You can explore accidentally deliberately reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean accidentally drain dad jokes. There are also accidentally puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

I accidentally clicked on a "You've won an iPhone"-popup.

Luckliy it was only a virus.

A man accidentally rear-ended a car

The driver whom was rear-ended steps out of the car and, to the mans surprise, was a dwarf. He walks to the man and says "I am NOT happy."

The man responds: "Then which one are you?"

A police officer accidentally arrested a judge who was dressed like a convict for a costume party.

He quickly learned to never book a judge by their cover

I accidentally swallowed a handful of Scrabble tiles...

My next bowel movement could spell disaster.

Accidentally called 911

Set my house on fire to not look stupid.

Accidentally joke, Accidentally called 911

I accidentally walked in on my daughter masturbating

I accidentally walked in on my daughter masturbating with a cucumber and I immediately shut the door.

"Ewe gross, I was going to eat that later, now it's going to taste like a cucumber"

I tried to start an online bakery.

But I accidentally deleted all my cookies.

A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Indian man were waiting outside the delivery room.

The matron comes out and explains that the hospital has accidentally mixed up the babies.

The Scot goes straight in and picks up the brown baby.

The Indian says "Are you sure that's your baby?"

The Scot says "No, but there's no way I'm going to risk leaving here with an English baby."

The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick.

I accidentally gave her a glue stick.

She still isn't talking to me.

I bought my son a puppy for his birthday, but I accidentally backed over him in the driveway and killed him...

Sure is gonna be tough raising this puppy without him.

People keep accidentally asking me to purchase meat for them

"By mistake?"

"Oh come on.. Not you as well"

My wife and I had a huge argument because she accidentally flooded the kitchen

but we've sorted it now. It's all water under the fridge.

I told my friend people keep accidentally asking me to buy meat for them.

He asked: "By mistake?"

I said: "Oh come on, not you too!"

I accidentally sent my friend flowers over the internet

Whoops, E-Daisies

My girlfriend accidentally discovered a way to get long lashes instantly

By showing a bit of ankles in Saudi Arabia

Accidentally joke, My girlfriend accidentally discovered a way to get long lashes instantly

I accidentally combined Fahrenheit and milliliters

FmL

I accidentally referred to my wife as my girlfriend today

Their names aren't even that similar

"911, what's your emergency?"

*"Me and my friend were out hunting and... I accidentally shot him and now he's dead!"*
"Alright, sir, calm down. Now, we need to be sure he's actually dead before we do anything else."
**BANG**
*"Okay, what next?"*

BOSS: What's going on here?

BOSS: What's going on here?

JAMES: Dave's mad because he specifically labelled his sandwich in the fridge and I accidentally-

DAVE: Not accidentally, on purpose!!

JAMES: ugh ok FINE. And I, "on purpose", slept with his wife

I accidentally drank the water we used to color eggs for Easter.

I think I dyed a little inside.

My dad come up to my room, and handed me my soaking wet wallet, after accidentally leaving it in my jeans as they went through the wash.

"Son, you're going to have to stop money laundering."

Did you hear about the archeologist who accidentally destroyed his dig site?

His career is in ruins.

Two men on a train both have black eyes.

Man 1: "how did you get that black eye?"

Man 2: "I was buying my ticket from this beautiful busty girl and instead of saying 'a ticket to Pittsburgh' I accidentally said I wanted 'a picket to Tittsburgh' so she hit me. How about you?"

Man 1: "Yeah, something similar happened to me. I was sitting around having breakfast with my wife and I meant to say 'pass the wheaties' and I accidentally said 'you ruined my life you stupid bitch'."

I accidentally typed my symptoms into IMDB instead of WebMD

and found out I have Gary Busey

I accidentally installed a program that keeps showing me a picture of a Chinese politician.

I think it's maoware.

A woman was sobbing on the side of the street because she had accidentally locked her keys in her car,

a passing soldier saw this and assured her that he can help.

She looks on amazed as he removes his trousers, rolls them into a tight ball and rubs them against the car door.

Magically it opens....... "That's so clever," the woman gasps. "How did you do it?"

"Easy," replies the soldier. "These are my khakis."

My wife divorced me because I accidentally put it in the wrong hole

Fair enough it was her sister's but still...

I accidentally bought too many art supplies

I'm having an excess stencil crisis.

I accidentally sprayed deodorant in my mouth...

and now I talk with a strange Axe scent.

I accidentally called my wife a 'trophy' the other day...

She shot back, Oh come on, just because you always finish first doesn't mean you win anything!

I accidentally sprayed deodorant in my mouth

Now when I talk, I have this weird axe scent

I tried to explain to my 4-year-old son that it's perfectly normal to accidentally poop your pants,

but he's still making fun of me.

I accidentally deleted an audiobook I was listening to

Now I'll never hear the end of it

Yesterday I accidentally sent a naked picture of myself to everyone in my address book.

Not only was it embarrassing but it cost a fortune in stamps.

I accidentally sprayed deodorant in my mouth today...

Now when I talk I have this weird axe scent.

A blonde accidentally kills a cop and calls the police:

- Hello, is this 911?
- Yes, what is your emergency?
- I called to inform you that you're 910 now.

I was cleaning one of my finger guns.

I accidentally blew a hole through my air guitar.

The other day, my girlfriend asked me to pass her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick.

She still isn't talking to me.

My crush just sneezed and I accidentally replied "bless you !"

Now she's staring at the bush, wondering who said that.

A funeral service is being held in a synagogue for a woman who has just passed away.

At the end of the service, the pall bearers are carrying the casket out when they accidentally bump into a wall jarring the casket.
They hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive. She lives for 10 more years and then dies.
A ceremony is again held at the same synagogue and at the end of the ceremony the pall bearers are again carrying the casket.
As they are walking the husband cries out, "Watch out for the wall!"

I accidentally put corn starch in my novel..

The plot thickened.

This is a bit wordy…

I accidentally swallowed some scrabble tiles, and now I'm experiencing some unexpected vowel movements. The next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster.

What do you call a detective who just solves cases accidentally?

Sheer Luck Holmes

A funeral service is held for a woman who just passed away. As the pallbearers carry the casket out, they accidentally bump into a wall.

Suddenly, a faint moaning is heard from the casket. The casket is opened, and it is found that the woman is actually alive. She lives for ten more years and then dies.

They have another funeral for her. At the end of the service, the pallbearers carry out the casket.

As they are walking, the husband cries out, "Watch out for the wall!"

My son accidentally glued his autobiography to himself

That's his story and he's sticking to it.

A chemist accidentally froze himself at -273.15C

Don't worry though, he's 0K

I accidentally sprayed deodorant in my mouth this morning.

All day I've been speaking with a weird axe scent.

Guys, abortion may be illegal soon. If you accidentally get a girl pregnant, make sure she's an anti-vaxxer.

Instead of paying for 18 years of child support, you'll only have to pay for 3.

I almost lost my job as a DJ at a country music station

I accidentally played the same three songs for five hours. Fortunately, our listeners didn't seem to notice.

An Scotsman accidentally dropped a penny into an open sewage pit

The pit was full of excrement, and after a few moments of thinking the Scotsman concluded:

"It's not worth it. I will never dive in for a penny!"

Then he checked his pockets for some change, picked two pounds and throw it to the pit:

"Now it's better" he said and jumped into the sewage.

I accidentally got anti aging cream on my block of cheddar

I've now got milk all over the kitchen top

So Fred has accidentally cut off John's ear with his spade.

John and Fred were digging a ditch when Fred made a careless swipe with his spade and cut off John's ear.

"Help me find it in all this mud," said John. "If we find it they can sew it back on."

After a couple of minutes, Fred triumphantly shouted, "Here it is", handing the ear to John.

"That's not it," said John, throwing the ear back in the muddy ditch. "Mine had a pencil behind it."

AITA: I went to an orgy last night as a dominatrix and accidentally hooked up with someone else's submissive.

Oops wrong sub

Do you know about the butcher that kept accidentally backing into the meat grinder?

He always got a little behind with his orders

What is a Freudian slip?

It's when you mean to say one thing, but you accidentally say your mother.

Kids

As we were putting out cookies for Santa on Christmas Eve, I accidentally dropped one. "No problem," I said, picking it up and dusting it off before placing it back on the plate.

"You can't do that," argued my four-year-old.

"Don't worry. Santa will never know."

He shot me a look. "So he knows if I've been bad or good, but he doesn't know the cookie fell on the floor?

I accidentally put diesel in the escort.

She's dead now.

I accidentally drank holy water with my laxatives

I will start a religious movement anytime now

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the accidentally tifu puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working accidentally help i accidentally piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes