Accelerator Jokes

Discover the hilarious side of physics with these funny particle accelerator jokes! Go full speed with the wheel and throttle with laughter while learning more about the science of acceleration. Get ready to rev up your sense of humor!

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Best Short Accelerator Jokes

These are our top accelerator puns. Have fun with a good accelerator joke in English with simple accelerator humour.

  1. A police officer stopped my mom's car. Officer: First name?
    Mom: Frida
    Officer: Last name?
    Mom: Gomam
    Officer: So you're Frida Gomam?
    And my mom hit the accelerator.
  2. Black lives matter. Unless you accelerate them to the velocity of light, then black lives energy.
  3. Yo momma's so fat that objects 5 meters away accelerate at 1 m/s^2 toward her. What is yo momma's mass if G = 6.67x10^-11Nm^2/kg^2? Please, someone help me, I can't solve it and it's making me nuts.
  4. What type of objects do not accelerate, regardless of the force applied? Letterhead and envelopes. No matter how hard you try, they remain stationery!
  5. Two kinds of nerds: May the force be ____________
    a. equal to mass times acceleration.
    b. with you.
  6. I heard that CERN particle accelerator can create a huge black hole and destroy the planet. This make me a little conCERNed.
    Eddit. The situation is accelerating if you know what I mean.
  7. I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone.
    Credit to Steven Wright.
  8. What's the difference between a particle accelerator and Donald Trump? One is a large hadron collider and the other is a small hard-on colluder
  9. Did you know that corks come from trees? Son-"Hey dad, did you know that corks come from trees?
    Dad- "No son, Quarks come from particle accelerators"
  10. "You heard about the lady who died riding a roller coaster?" "What? How?"
    "Apparently the acceleration was too much for her."
Accelerator joke, "You heard about the lady who died riding a roller coaster?"

Make fun with this list of one liners, gags and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor found in these accelerator jokes can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of accelerator puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, these jokes offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Accelerator One Liners

Which accelerator dad jokes are funny enough to crack down and make fun with accelerator?

  1. May the force be... ... Equal to Mass times Acceleration.
  2. All the atoms go to the bar Quantum Accelerator Why? Because it's a smashing time
  3. What do you call a truck that can't accelerate? A pickup with no pickup
  4. I'm gonna be honest with you... Particle accelerators give me a hadron.
  5. Did you hear about the object undergoing centripetal acceleration... It went on a tangent
  6. What program does accelerate your PC? Excel
  7. Why does work get scientists mad? Because it's mass times acceleration times distance.
  8. Ok guys I have a confession.... Particle accelerators give me a hadron....
  9. What does HONDA stand for? Hold On, Not Done Accelerating.
  10. Your clothes would look better accelerating towards the floor at 9.8 m/s
  11. Did you guys hear that the hadron accelerator exploded? It was mass m**....
  12. Why did the l**... c**... his car? He left his foot on the accelerator.
  13. Why was the l**... caught speeding? Because he couldn't take his foot off the accelerator.

Particle Accelerator Jokes

Here is a list of funny particle accelerator jokes and even better particle accelerator puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Chuck Norris doesn't need a particle accelerator to collide atoms, he just smashes his fists together.
Accelerator joke

Heartwarming Accelerator Jokes that Make You Laugh

What funny jokes about accelerator to tell and make people laugh ? Check out these list of good jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make accelerator prank.

Blind pilots

A plane is preparing for takeoff with a full load of passengers when the pilot and copilot board--both with dark sunglasses and tapping walking sticks for guidance. The passengers are understandably uncomfortable, but assume it must be some sort of practical joke, so they say nothing.
As the plane begins to accelerate, the passengers see the end of the runway rapidly approaching, with certain doom awaiting at the end if the pilots really can't see what they're doing. Just before the end of the runway, all the passengers scream together--right before the plane lifts off. They're a little upset, but relieved that the pilots aren't really blind.
In the cockpit, the pilot turned to his copilot and remarked: "you know, Lou, one of these days they're not going to scream in time, and then we'll be in real trouble!"

Silly Drunks.

A drunk phoned the police to report that thieves had been in his car.
"They've stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, even the accelerator!" he cried out.
However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time with the same voice on the line.
"Nevermind," he said with a hiccup. "I got in the back seat by mistake."

I took my old computer to a computer repair shop

I asked the shop owner "My computer is too slow. What can I do ?"
Shop owner inspected the computer and said "It needs some hardware acceleration"
Me: How much acceleration would it need ?
Shop owner: 9.8 meter per second squared.


An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to the dispatcher: "They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake pedal and even the accelerator!
" she cried. The dispatcher said, "Stay calm. An officer is on the way."

A few minutes later, the officer radios in.
"Disregard," he says. She got in the back-seat by mistake."


Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like kids and toddlers can enjoy. They can be verbal, as in a play on words, or narrative, often involving a set-up and a punchline. JokoJokes has it all! Jokes in Spanish are also found. Teens are often joking with 4 year olds and 6 year olds. Found out more in our Jokes FAQ section

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The impact of these accelerator jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.