The Best 18 Absolutes Jokes

Following is our collection of Absolutes jokes which are very funny. There are some absolutes absolute jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these absolutes unconditional puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Why don't Jedi Knights use the Kelvin scale?

Only a Sith deals in absolutes.

Why do the Jedi refuse to measure temperature using Kelvin?

Because only a Sith deals in absolutes

My wife said to me if I don't stop quoting Star Wars she's going to leave me

I replied "Only a Sith deals in absolutes"

Everyone talks about how May 4th is 100% hands down the best Star Wars holiday ever....

But only a fifth May deal in absolutes..

My wife told me she was tired of me always talking about StarWars and nothing else

I told her only a Sith deals in absolutes


why is it general kenobi and not specific kenobi ?

only a sith deals in absolutes

To find a women you need time and money

To find a women you need time and money; therefore *Women=Time+Money*

But "Time is Money", therefore: Time=Money and so *Women=Money*Money* or Money^2

But "Money is the root of all Problems", therefore: *Money=√All_Problems*

using those two absolutes we can say that
Women=(√All_Problems)^2

**Women=All_Problems**

Why did Obi-wan not do his math homework?

Because only a Sith deals in absolutes.

Why couldn't Obi-Wan calculate the volume of Bespin from the ideal gas law?

Only a Sith deals in absolutes

β€” Only idiots deal in absolutes.

β€” Are you sure?
– Completely.

How do you approach a Care Bear that deals in absolutes?

Carefully.

Top Absolutes Puns and Funny Jokes

You can explore absolutes lightsaber reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean absolutes calculate dad jokes. There are also absolutes puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Why are the Sith never negative?

They only deal in absolutes.

Why don't Jedi mathematicians use the absolute value function?

Because only a Sith deals in absolutes.

^and ^it's ^non-differentiable ^at ^0

Why couldn't Luke calculate Abs(-1)?

Only a sith deals in absolutes.

If you were in a 'choose a movie/comic book character, or you die' situation. Who would you be?

Sith. Because only a sith deals in absolutes.

Why are Sith measurements not as accurate as Jedis'?

Because a Sith deals only in absolutes.

I don't speak in absolutes.

Not now. Not ever.

Was helping somebody do their math homework dealing with absolute values.

I then realized that her math teacher was a Sith Lord, because only Sith Lords deal in absolutes.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the absolutes dagobah jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working absolutes kenobi piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes