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Absolute Value Jokes

24 absolute value jokes and hilarious absolute value puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about absolute value that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Absolute Value Short Jokes

Short absolute value jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The absolute value humour may include short absolute zero jokes also.

  1. Why don't Jedi mathematicians use the absolute value function? Because only a Sith deals in absolutes.
    ^and ^it's ^non-differentiable ^at ^0
  2. Calculus is seriously aking an effect on my life lol looks like absolute value of 0 to me now.
  3. The number 0 went to an absolute value party to see what all the fuss was about He was nonplussed.
  4. Was helping somebody do their math homework dealing with absolute values. I then realized that her math teacher was a Sith Lord, because only Sith Lords deal in absolutes.

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Absolute Value One Liners

Which absolute value one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with absolute value? I can suggest the ones about negative number and negative numbers.

  1. What's the absolute value of zero? lol
  2. The absolute value of 0 is no laughing matter lol
  3. Math is evil... Only the Sith deal in absolute values.
  4. Why is the absolute value of 0 funny? l 0 l
  5. Why does everyone find the absolute value of zero so funny? l0l
  6. What the absolute value of o? You can't absolute value letters silly. lol
  7. Why is absolute value never sad It always stays positive
  8. What is the absolute value of a woman? They have no value
  9. I think everyone should find their absolute values It makes them positive.

Absolute Value Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about absolute value you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean magnitude jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make absolute value pranks.

I tried to come up with a math joke...

but all my ideas were derivative
and the punchline didn't add up.
Anyway, comedy has no absolute value.
Your jokes are sum of the best,
but minus not very funny
because I'm a perfect square.
I halve one, I guess...
but you're too obtuse to get it,
and trying to simplify it
has left me divided
and at my limit.

A teacher was arrested because he attempted to board a flight while possessing a ruler, protractor, and calculator...

(sorry it's *slightly* outdated but funny nonetheless)
A teacher was arrested because he attempted to board a flight while possessing a ruler, protractor, and calculator. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said he believes the man's a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. The man's been charged with carrying weapons of math instruction.
Al-gebra is a problem for us, Gonzales said. Its followers desire solutions by means and extremes and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as unknowns,' but we've determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval, with coordinates in every country.
When asked to comment on the arrest, George W. Bush said, If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He'd have given us more fingers and toes. Aides told reporters they couldn't recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President.