Abracadabra Jokes

A magician says to his audience...

A magician says to his audience "I can make myself appear in 100 different places in this room". He says "3, 2, 1, Abracadabra!" Nothing happens so he tries once again, "3, 2, 1, Abracadabra!" Still nothing happens. Flustered he asks to be excused while he checks his handbook. He closes the book and says " Sorry, I've been saying the wrong magic word, 3, 2, 1, Allahu Akbar!" Needless to say his audience was blown away.

The realistic magician

A magician is winding down to the end of a performance, and in preparation for his final trick, he asks for a volunteer from the audience. A man comes up, and the magician says, "Okay, now I'm going to lay my head down on this block, and when I say 'abra-cadabra', I want you to smack the side of my head with this sledgehammer." The magician kneels carefully, positions his head on the block, and says, "Abra-cadabra!" And the guy from the audience winds up and smacks him on the side of the head with the hammer. The magician crumples to the stage, unconscious, and goes into a deep coma.

Ten years later, he wakes up in the hospital, looks at the nurse, and says, "TA - DAA!!!"

What's a a magician's favorite kind of coffee?

100% abracadabra

A Vampire met a genie

"I'll give you three wishes, no more, no less" Said the Genie to the Vampire.

"I want to have wings. It's weird to be able to fly without wings." Said the Vampire.

"It shall be done, what about the second wish?"

"I want virgins! Lots of virgins!"

"It shall be done, and the last?"

"I want blood! Lots of blood!"

"Abracadabra hocus pocus" The genie casted the spell.

****Poof****

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And the Vampire turned into a sanitary pad.

What does a magician have under their clothes

An Abracada-bra.

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