Abra Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Abra jokes. Read abra illusions jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) that will make you laugh out loud.

Enjoy this list of puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these abra sledgehammer puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Uproarious Abra Jokes to Share with Friends

If Abraham Lincoln were alive right now, he'd probably say...

...why is it so dark in here?

What did Abraham Lincoln say when he heard there's a movie about him hunting vampires?

"What the f**...'s a movie..."

What do you call a Greek Magician?

Abra Kebabra

What do Abraham Lincoln and Ryan Fitzpatrick have in common?

Neither of them can finish a play

jokes about abra

What's a feminists least favorite Pokemon?


What do Abraham Lincoln and Peyton Manning have in common?

Neither can finish a play.

What did Abraham Lincoln say after a three-day drinking spree?

"I freed the what?"

Abra joke, What did Abraham Lincoln say after a three-day drinking spree?

What would Abraham Lincoln say if he found out there was a movie about him slaying vampires?

What's a movie?

Abraham Lincoln was better at finishing plays than the Seahawks.

What was Abraham Lincoln's seating preference?

Not John Wilkes Booth!

Why didn't Abraham Lincoln go to jail?

Because he was in-a-cent!

You can explore abra dela reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean abra dissappear dad jokes. There are also abra puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

I think if Abraham Lincoln were alive today...

He would probably look around, scream, and then desperately claw at the inside of his coffin.

Abraham Lincoln.

The reason I now have to hire a dishwasher instead of buying one.

Why can't Abraham Lincoln be convicted for m**...?

Because he's in a cent.

Where did Abraham Lincoln go in 1865?

All over the wall

What do you call a dead magician?

Abra Cadaver.

Abra joke, What do you call a dead magician?

What do Abraham Lincoln and an '80s sitcom have in common?

Both were shot before a live audience.

Real definition of Zebra from Blonde's perspective

What is a Zebra?
A Z-bra is 25 sizes bigger than an A-bra.

If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, what would he be famous for?

Old age

If Abraham Lincoln was alive today...

He'd be desperately clawing at the lid of his coffin.

What did Abraham Lincoln say after recovering from a 3-day drinking binge?

*"I set* ***who*** *free?"*

How come Abraham Lincoln never went to jail?

Because he was in a cent

Abraham Lincoln walks out in his garden in heaven and sees his neighbor in his own garden

Abraham: "Your grass is getting long, shouldn't you cut it?"
Neighbor: "Yeah... You know, I used to have people for that..."

Did you know Abraham Lincoln was jewish?

He was shot in the temple

Abraham Lincoln could never call himself a republican today.

Because he was murdered while watching a play in 1865.

What does J.J. Abrams stand for?

Jar Jar Abrams.

(Thanks Mark Hamil for the inspiration ❤️)

Abra joke, What does J.J. Abrams stand for?

What did Abraham Lincoln say when he was falesly accused of a crime?

"I'm in a cent"

Abracadabra... Manual breathing, blinking, and swallowing... all gone!

If Abraham Lincoln were gay, what would he be all over?


I often like to think that if Abraham Lincoln was around today...

He'd probably be the oldest person alive.

Abraham wandered into Sam's pawnshop and placed a leather coat on the counter.

How much will you give me for this jacket?

Sam checked it over. $20, and that's the best he replied.

But that jacket is worth $100" argued Abraham.

Sam was adamant. $20 or nothing.

Are you sure that's all it's worth? pressed Abe.


Okay, said Abe. "Here's your $20.  The jacket was hanging in your doorway and I was wondering how much it was worth.

I don't like Abraham Lincoln

He wasn't very headstrong.

Abraham Lincoln passed the constipation proclamation...

He set the brown things free.

Why did Abraham Lincoln die?

Because he kept Abraham Drinkin'.

It's funny because he was shot.

What did Abraham Lincoln say after a 2-week bender?

I freed WHO?

What was Abraham Lincoln's favorite pasta?


Abraham Lincoln was a great thinker

I wonder what the last thing to go through his head was...

If it weren't for Abraham Lincoln,...

America would have really gone South.

Why was Abraham Lincoln never impeached?

Because he is in-a-cent.

What did Abraham Lincoln say when he was accused of stealing a penny?

"Hey! I'm in-a-cent!"

Why can't Abraham Lincoln drive a car?

...cause he's dead.

What did Abraham Lincoln names his wiener?

The Lincoln Log!

What did the magician say just before he pulled a dead rabbit out of his hat?

Abra Cadaver.

Abraham Lincoln went to see a play without bringing the Secret Service

He never heard the end of it

What did the magician say when his assistant died during the show?

Abra cadaver!

Remember that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes that make girls laugh. Many of the abra reappear puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When a joke goes too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke becomes inappropriate.

We suggest you to use only working abra hocus piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and make them laugh.

Joko Jokes