Abortions Jokes

Abortions are so fun

It really brings out the kid in you

I can't stand abortions

I'm ok with killing babies... but the idea of a woman making decisions just doesn't sit right with me.

What's the most offensive joke you have heard?

Here is a few I've heard:
What's the best thing about sex with twenty one year olds?
There's twenty of them

How do you get an emo out of a tree?
Cut the rope

What do you call a black woman who's had 7 abortions?
A crime fighter

Whats the difference between a jew and a dollar?
People would care about losing 6 million dollars

What do you call a black woman who's had 4 abortions?

A crime fighter.

It always shocks me when people say republicans are anti-communists

With trying to make abortions illegal, get rid of birth control, defund planned parenthood, those all are textbook examples of seizing the means of reproduction.

Our local planned parenthood refuses to provide homeless women with abortions.

They say beggars can't be choosers.

Religious people get mad about abortions because they think it's killing babies.

They must've forgotten what Passover was about.

Abortions are like stains in my carpet.

You don't want them to be seen, and you pay somebody to vacuum them out.

I don't know how to feel about abortions.

On the one hand you get to kill a kid. On the other, it gives women a choice.

Pros and cons: Choice for abortions

Pro: Killing babies.

Con: Giving women a choice.

Millenials are Killing the Coat Hanger Industry

more than half of them support legal abortions.

So Rick Perry drops his presidential bid Today..

I thought his campaign wasn't for late term abortions.

Some people are really tired after abortions...

It's like they got life sucked out of them.


Really suck the life outta you

What's the best part about abortions?

They never get old

daughter: Dad, what's your opinion on abortions?

Dad: Ask your sister

daughter: but I don't have a sister

Dad: exactly

I was thinking of opening up a new business...

For teenage abortions called:
Little miss conceptions

Time for a joke.

"Dad, how do you feel about abortions?"
"Well, why don't you ask your sister?"
"But I don't have a..."

In memory of the late George Carlin

Catholics hate abortions.

Catholics hate homosexuals.

But who has less abortions than homosexuals?

I don't know much about stairwell abortions...

But I've heard their use is going down.

What type of equipment do you operate for abortions?

A baby excavator.

I heard abortions are quite exhausting..

I was confused too, but apparently it really takes it out of you.

(Dark humor) They say there's safety in numbers...

Tell that to 6 million Jews

One day, white and black people will be living and working together as one

In Chinese concentration camps.

What do you call a black woman who has had multiple abortions?

A crime fighter

Do you know what the best thing about abortions is?

They never get old :D

Why are abortions so expensive

Because they're worth it.

Well, if Roe v Wade gets overturned...

... at least women of color will still be able to get legal abortions. Just tell a cop it looks dangerous.

I'm can't make up my mind on abortions

On the one hand you're killing babies, which I am for, but on the other hand you're giving women rights, which I'm against.

It's not a coincidence that a lot of conservatives who oppose abortions are also hunters

They know that anything they kill, they have to eat.

See the problem with the left is that...

the wrong people are getting the abortions.

I like my steaks the way I like my abortions

Safe, legal and rare.

How did the city reduce crime?

They started giving free abortions to black women!

There's a guy at the fertility clinic that specializes in abortions. His name is Larry Croft.

He's a Womb Raider.

We have collected gags that can be used as Abortions pranks to have fun with. If you want to stand out in a crowd with a good sense of humour joking about Abortions, here are one liners and funny Abortions pick up lines.

Joko Jokes