Following is our collection of pregnancies humor and contraceptive one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Abortion puns for adults, dirty surrogate jokes or clean antiabortion gags for kids.
There is an abundance of deletus jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 53 funniest jokes on abortion. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any spawn witze you can hear about abortion.
Father: "Ask your sister.
Daughter: "I don't have a si-"
They gave me the dirtiest look when I went in and asked to borrow a coathanger.
It really brings out the kid in you
Don't get an abortion.
They get really angry if you go in and ask for a coat hanger
I support killing babies, but I don't support giving women a choice.
Because there is no delivery.
Having to go inside and asking for a coat hanger.
Decaffeinated
A cancelled check.
Girl: Dad, do you believe in abortion?
Father: Ask your sister.
Girl: I don't have a sister...
Father: Exactly.
On one side, I love to kill babies but on the other side, I hate to give women a choice.
You'll never de-fetus.
Woomba
on one side it's killing babies and I'm all for that, but it gives women a choice. Do we really want that?
She said, "because they bring out the kid in me."
Those doctors demonstrate a complete lack of humanity. Spawn killing is a filthy tactic.
When you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger.
Is jerking off genocide?
Trump is sitting in the oval office when mike pence walks in. Pence says, here's the abortion bill you just need to sign it Mr. President
Trump replies "I thought Michael cohen paid for that"
Survival of the fetus
I'm undecided.
On one hand, I like killing babies, on the other, I don't like giving women a choice.
Or $2000 if you count the abortion.
Some of the better ones
* City Morgue, you stab 'em, we slab 'em
* Mario's Pizzaria and Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce, may I take your order?
* Roadkill Cafe, you kill it, we grill it
* Mort's Mortuary, you slice 'em, we ice 'em
* Bob's Back Alley Abortion Parlour, you rape 'em, we scrape 'em, no fetus can beat us
Anyone have more?
On one hand, I love killing babies, on the other I hate giving women rights.
...called "Don't Kid Yourself."
The most effective form of spawn camping
How about 'Birth Ctrl+Z' ?
Has a zero percent success rate at the abortion clinic.
Abortion
Abortion doctors are also called spawn campers
On one hand, i am for killing babies. But on the other hand, i don't want to give woman any more rights.
Except abortion jokes, which by definition have no delivery.
Decalfeinated. Thank you, I'll show myself out now.
On one hand, it kills babies, which I'm for. On the other hand, it gives women a choice, which I'm against.
Male and abortion.
So if you accidentally start forming one, you should terminate it before it comes to fruition.
The nurse says, "How can I help you?"
Girl says, "LYING BASTARDS!" and leaves.
Having to go in and ask for a coat hanger.
--Ask your sister
--But I don't have a sis...
*fetus, deletus!*
^It's ^my ^first ^time ^posting ^here. ^Tell ^me ^if ^I ^did ^something ^wrong ^or ^if ^this ^is ^the ^wrong ^sub...
^And ^yes, ^I ^am ^a ^Muggle.
Little miss conception
She looked me straight in the eyes and said "I'm so glad I didn't get an abortion"
... abortion is birth control-alt-delete.
self.Jokes
....getting your keys locked in your car outside an abortion clinic?
Having to go in to ask for a coat hanger.
*Yet another Australian pub joke*
Donald Trump was talking about how opposed to it he was, but I thought to myself, come on Don, you're a businessman. I bet you wouldn't be this upset if you could charge them an early termination fee.
So I told her I'd cut it out.
Womb raider
throwing eggs at an abortion clinic?
My parents were recently discussing my pregnant cousin, who has been craving ice cream throughout here pregnancy, so I thought I'd ask my mother what she craved through her pregnancy.
"An abortion" wasn't the answer I was expecting.
I like killing babies but don't like giving women a choice
They don't have a delivery
Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.