Aborted Jokes

Why can't you fool an aborted baby?

Because he wasn't born yesterday

If Mary had aborted Jesus...

would he have reappeared in her womb three days later?

Ted Cruz has aborted his campaign

..but I say he should be forced to carry it to full term

There was once a woman...

One day a woman became pregnant, she took the advice of her mother and aborted it. A few weeks later she became pregnant again! She also did what her mother suggested... A few more weeks later she (once again -_-) got knocked up, tired of taking her mothers advice, she went to the local parish priest and said to him "I keep getting pregnant, there must be something in the air"! To which the priest replied "yes... Your legs"

Peter Pan and the Lost Boys are actually the souls of aborted kids

That explains Captain Hook

Twenty years ago my mother almost aborted my brother. Yesterday he died in a fight with a cloakroom attendant.

The coathanger still got him in the end.

My cousin recently had her baby aborted.

Such a shame, could have met my future first cousin once removed.

A joke about abortion.

Why can't you fool an aborted baby?

Because it wasn't born yesterday.

What do you call an aborted baby

Spawn Kill

If you're a scam artist, you should probably never go for an aborted fetus

After all, they weren't born yesterday.

Asked my mom why i wasn't aborted.

She said that the adoption ward can't do that on newborns.

You know what you call an aborted baby?

A secret

What does JFK and an aborted baby have in common?

Neither made it to their second term.

I'm not a Satanist, but I still aborted my daughter.

It was very sad.

She lived.

What's fresher than baby spinach?

Aborted spinach

A liberal died and went to heaven

He asked God, "God, why didn't you send down a man to cure cancer?"

God replied: "I did, but you aborted him"

YOLO for different beings:

YOLT = James Bond
OOYL= Yoda
YOLN = Cats
YOLF = Vampires
YNLO = Aborted babies

I couldn't decide whether to use a boat or go swimming, so i aborted my plans.

It was a case of row versus wade

A pilot was coming in for a landing in France...

Right as the plane was about to touch down, the pilot aborted the landing. I guess he had to much Toulouse

We have collected gags that can be used as Aborted pranks to have fun with. If you want to stand out in a crowd with a good sense of humour joking about Aborted, here are one liners and funny Aborted pick up lines.

Joko Jokes