Comical Ablaze Jokes to Spread Joy and Laughter
Fire at the Pub
A firehouse got a call about a pub. The firemen rushed there to see the place ablaze. They could hear someone calling for help from inside. Two of them ran in to see an Irishman trapped under debris. They were able to pull him out as the rest of them fought the fire. One of his rescuers asked how the fire started. The Irishman looked up at him and said, "I don't know, it was like this when I got here."
So I want to start losing weight and burning fat
So I set some obese kids ablaze
To catch an elephant (my favourite joke when I was a kid):
First off, you're going to need to dig an elephant-sized hole.
Next, fill the hole with wood and set it ablaze.
When the fire dies down to ashes, surround the hole with peas (elephants love peas).
Wait for an elephant to come take a pea.
Then kick it in the ash hole.
What did the father gasoline say to his wife gasoline about their son that was setting cars ablaze?
That's arson.
Do you know the story of how the death of Pinocchio came to be?
He was masturbating and unintentionally set himself ablaze.
How did Pinocchio die?
He was masturbating and unintentionally set himself ablaze.
Billy saw the barn was ablaze, sprinted down the street, burst into a bar room full of gunslingers and shouted "Fire! Fire!"
And they did.
A fireman kicks down the door of a house and carries the family out 1 by 1, but there is no fire. A week later the building catches ablaze.
He suffers from premature evacuation.
How do you make a cat go "woof!"
Pour lighter fluid on it and set it ablaze... "WOOOOF!"
A Frenchman calls the fire department...
He wakes up and his kitchen is ablaze. He calls the local fire department and says " Sacre Bleu! You must 'elp me! There eez a fire please come and put eet out ! "
The fireman on the phone responds " Calm down, we'll be right there, just tell us how to get there"
The Frenchman , confused , asks the fireman , " 'ow do you get 'ere? What 'appened to your big red trucks?!"
