The Best 11 Abduction Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Abduction jokes. There are some abduction hijack jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these abduction alien puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Abduction Jokes and Puns

People with an abduction fetish

Demand to be taken, seriously.

When my girlfriend told me she has an abduction fetish, I thought she was kidding.

But she demands to be taken, seriously!

Little joke I thought of: What do you call a duck being kidnapped?

An abduction.

I'll quietly leave through this conveniently placed door.

Alien abduction

Harry, Bill, and Steve are siting at the corner bar, when Ted walks in looking distressed. "Ted, you look awful. What's wrong?" Harry asks.
Ted says, "Last night I got really drunk and was abducted by an alien." Everyone is shocked. Bill asks, "What did the alien do to you?" "All I remember is being anally probed." Ted says. Everyone is horrified. "I heard that they'll do that." Says Harry. "What did the alien look like?" Ted responds, "Steve."

Every fish you catch and release

goes home with an alien abduction story.


I told my wife I'd never leave her unless aliens came to take me.

It has taken 30 years but I finally have enough for Industrial Light and Magic to do an alien abduction scene.

I thought my girlfriend was joking when she said she had an abduction fetish.

But she demands to be taken, seriously!

I saw a duck get kidnapped

It was an abduction

Back in the 70's you could hold out your hand and a car would pick you up and take you where you need....

Today we call that child abduction.

What do you call it when a foreigner kidnaps your son?

An alien abduction.

So I picked up this girl the other day...

...and got jailed for child abduction after a police chase.

You can explore abduction hostage reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean abduction abduct dad jokes. There are also abduction puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the abduction robberies jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working abduction pixelated piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes