80mph Jokes

I got pulled over the other day

So I was driving down the highway in my new Mercedes doin' about 80mph. I see red and blue flashin' lights in my rear-view mirror. I think to myself, 'I'm in a new Mercedes! Who could catch me?' So I start speedin' up 90mph, 100mph, 110mph, 120mph. He's still there. So I pull over and the cop takes my license and papers without sayin' a word. He comes back and says, "I've been pulling people over all day for speeding. If you can give me an excuse that I haven't heard, I'll let you go." So I sit there for a second then say to the officer, "Well, sir, my wife left me to live with a police officer the other day. So I thought you were trying to give her back!"

What does a non-moving cat and a motorcycle traveling at 80mph have in common?

They make the same sound.

When I was learning to drive, my parents told me I should never be on a highway where the flow of traffic was going more that 80mph.

Then I moved to Florida.

Just ran over chumbawamba with my car at 80mph

Lying Bastards!

We have collected gags that can be used as 80mph pranks to have fun with. If you want to stand out in a crowd with a good sense of humour joking about 80mph, here are one liners and funny 80mph pick up lines.

Joko Jokes