Following is our collection of bar puns and 9th one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including 7th jokes for adults, dirty fifteenth jokes and clean local dad gags for kids.
I thought to myself how do I turn it back to the 7th century?
I read that in a medical journal on page 34 at 3:23 pm last year on Wednesday November the 7th.
Mark dreams number 7.
He wakes up, looks at his watch: it was 7:07.
He looked at the calendar: July 7, 2007.
Decided it was a sign he's taking the bus 77.
Arrive at the track, put $ 7777 on the horse 7 from the 7th race.
The horse comes seventh.
He was having a mid-life crisis.
Our 7th son always looked different from the other 6, did he have a different father?"
Wife (crying): Yes!
Husband: Who?
Wife: You!
Husband Dies.
Man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots of Jägermeister.
The bartender looks at him and says "Wow 6 shots of Jäger! You must be celebrating something."
The man replies,"You bet I am! I am celebrating my first blow job."
"Hey congrats man!" says the Bartender "I'll get you a 7th shot on the house"
The man replies "No thank you. If 6 shots of Jäger doesn't get rid of this taste nothing will."
He saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her and asked if she knew what hole he was playing.
She replied, I'm on the 7th hole, and you're a hole behind me, so you must be on the 6th hole.
He thanked her and went back to his golf.
On the back nine, the same thing happened, and he approached the lady again with the same request.
She said, I'm on the 14th, you are a hole behind me, so you must be on the 13th.
Once again he thanked her.
He finished his round and went into the club house and saw the lady sitting at the end of the bar.
He went up to her and said, Let me buy you a drink to show my appreciation for your help.
He started a conversation and asked her what kind of work she did.
She said she was in sales, and he said he was in sales also. He asked what she sold.
She replied, If I told you, you would only laugh.
No, I wouldn't, he said.
She said, I sell tampons.
With that he fell on the floor laughing so hard.
She said, See, I knew you would laugh.
That's not what I'm laughing at, he replied. I'm a toilet paper salesman, so I'm STILL one hole behind you!
is the worst part.
It's called Islam. It can take any civilization back to the 7th century.
A Dying husband asks his wife: Our 7th son always looked different from the other 6, on my death bed, tell me the truth...did he have a different father?
Wife (crying): Yes!
Husband (in shock): Who?
Wife: You!
"Yes, it's all under control. It's been a very busy day, I haven't stopped."
"Can you do me a favor?"
"Of course, what is it?"
"Hurry up and take your shot, I'm behind you on the 7th hole."
This year, the principal said, "Last year, the 7th grade student did the cleaning. This year, let the 8th grade students do it."
Orders 6 shots of tequila.
Bartender says: " what are we celebrating?"
Young man says; " my first blow job"
Bartender says; " well here's a 7th shot on the house"
Young man's says: " if 6 ain't going to get the taste out, 7 won't"
So when someone sees the moon that day, they will likely see Uranus too...
The 7th Panzer division
He orders 7 pints of beer, he drinks the first pint, the third pint, the 5th and the 7th pint and gets up to leave. The barman says why are you not drinking the other three pints.? He says, doctors orders, what do you mean by that asks the barman.? I am on medication and my doctor said to me the odd pint is okay.
Super Bowls XXXVI (2001), XXXVIII (2003), XXXIX (2004), XLIX (2014), LI (2016), LIII (2018), Prostitution Ring (2019)!
To get a sixpac!
(Thank you 7th grade me)
7th floor:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHH
...
*thud*
2nd floor:
*thud*
...
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH
Sorry.
...which was disconcerting.
One night I was dreaming the number 7, over an over. To my amazement, when I woke up it was 7 o'clock, on July the 7th. So I took the bus on line 7 straight to the racetrack and bet 7777$ on the 7th horse from the 7th round. It finished on 7th.
A guy enters a bar and orders 6 bacardi coke's. Bartender asks if he has something to celebrate. ''Yes!'' says the guy, ''I had oral sex for the first time!''
Bartender: ''Nice, congrats! The 7th is on the house then!''
The guy: ''No thanks, if the taste sticks after 6 drinks, it wil after 7 as well ...
She said to him I have something to confess.
Yes?
You know our 7th child, Little Joe?
He's not mine?
No, he is yours.
Eat apples for 6 straight days and on the 7th day eat an orange instead , then the worm will come out of your stomach and ask " dude where's my apple???" then you take a baseball bat and beat him to death.
I mean, it was the 7th of April months ago...
The 7th Panzer Devision
To get a 6Pac!
-7th grade me
According to 7th commandment, it was considered an ✓((1/2 i e^(-i x) - 1/2 i e^(i x))^2 )...
to the 7th century.
My brother comes home from school one day and tells me his friend was held after school.
I asked him what for.
He said he moved all the women's rights books in the library into the fiction department.
Cuz I'm Og.
(yay for the completion of the 7th row of the periodic table!)
Are You Stronger Than A 7th Grader?
Cause eight reindeer and a sleigh are a lot quicker than 6 pigs and a stoneboat.
It makes you go, Hey, thats the 7th time I've seen that guy today!
Japan must just love dropping bombs that day
Iran
And the Proton replies
"Yeah man, I just caught my wife cheating, I need to forget...".
The 7th German Panzer Division
... every December 7th he would attack Pearl Bailey.
He also maintains that it's September 7th, 1998.
In 7th grade my teacher walked in , took a long pause , then looked at all of us and said, "Never get married".
Every December 7th he attacked Pearl Jam.
83% hydrogen, 15% helium and 2% methane.
Every December 7th he'd have an urge to bomb Pearl Bailey.
Blackbird I think.
His grave is the 7th one down and the 3rd one across.
A week.
Because he felt a little week.
There is an abundance of life jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 50 funniest jokes and 7th puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any arabia witze you can hear about 7th.
Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.