The Best 52 7th Jokes
Following is our collection of funny 7th jokes. There are some 7th 9th jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these 7th local puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 Funniest 7th Jokes and Puns
As we landed in Saudi Arabia the pilot announced "Ladies and Gentlemen don't forget to adjust your watches to local time"
I thought to myself how do I turn it back to the 7th century?
Did you know too much sex can cause memory loss
I read that in a medical journal on page 34 at 3:23 pm last year on Wednesday November the 7th.
I'm unhappy with prime day
Amazon Prime day is on the 21st. I personally would not partake of Prime day unless it were on the 2nd, 3rd, 5th, 7th, 11th, 13th, 17th, 19th, 23rd, 29th, or 31st
Did you guys know too much sex can cause memory loss?
I learnt that in a medical journal, page 34. At 3:38pm on Thursday the 7th.
Number 7
Mark dreams number 7.
He wakes up, looks at his watch: it was 7:07.
He looked at the calendar: July 7, 2007.
Decided it was a sign he's taking the bus 77.
Arrive at the track, put $ 7777 on the horse 7 from the 7th race.
The horse comes seventh.
What did Kurt Kobain have such a terrible time in 7th grade?
He was having a mid-life crisis.
Dying husband asks his wife:
Our 7th son always looked different from the other 6, did he have a different father?"
Wife (crying): Yes!
Husband: Who?
Wife: You!
Husband Dies.
Man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots of Jägermeister
Man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots of Jägermeister.
The bartender looks at him and says "Wow 6 shots of Jäger! You must be celebrating something."
The man replies,"You bet I am! I am celebrating my first blow job."
"Hey congrats man!" says the Bartender "I'll get you a 7th shot on the house"
The man replies "No thank you. If 6 shots of Jäger doesn't get rid of this taste nothing will."
A man playing on a new golf course got confused as to what hole he was on.
He saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her and asked if she knew what hole he was playing.
She replied, I'm on the 7th hole, and you're a hole behind me, so you must be on the 6th hole.
He thanked her and went back to his golf.
On the back nine, the same thing happened, and he approached the lady again with the same request.
She said, I'm on the 14th, you are a hole behind me, so you must be on the 13th.
Once again he thanked her.
He finished his round and went into the club house and saw the lady sitting at the end of the bar.
He went up to her and said, Let me buy you a drink to show my appreciation for your help.
He started a conversation and asked her what kind of work she did.
She said she was in sales, and he said he was in sales also. He asked what she sold.
She replied, If I told you, you would only laugh.
No, I wouldn't, he said.
She said, I sell tampons.
With that he fell on the floor laughing so hard.
She said, See, I knew you would laugh.
That's not what I'm laughing at, he replied. I'm a toilet paper salesman, so I'm STILL one hole behind you!
Lucky Number 7
I had a vivid dream of the number 7, just a giant 7... and when I woke up, it was 7:00... so I get up and decide to go to the track, because I like to play the ponies.. and I get a cab, and the cab pulls up, and it's number 7... so I get to the track and I ask what I owe, and it was $7.77... I go in through gate 7 and the only booth open is the 7th. I look at the board and in the 7th race there's a horse named Lucky Number 7 and his odds are 77/1. So I put $700 on him... and believe it not... he came in 7th.
(Cr
The Arabs invented a time machine.
It's called Islam. It can take any civilization back to the 7th century.
You can explore 7th bar reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean 7th fifteenth dad jokes. There are also 7th puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
The way I combed my hair in 7th grade
is the worst part.
Last year, 7th grade students were forced to clean the entire school.
This year, the principal said, "Last year, the 7th grade student did the cleaning. This year, let the 8th grade students do it."
A Dying husband asks his wife....
A Dying husband asks his wife: Our 7th son always looked different from the other 6, on my death bed, tell me the truth...did he have a different father?
Wife (crying): Yes!
Husband (in shock): Who?
Wife: You!
A guy's boss who is traveling calls him and asks, "Is everything okay at the office?"
"Yes, it's all under control. It's been a very busy day, I haven't stopped."
"Can you do me a favor?"
"Of course, what is it?"
"Hurry up and take your shot, I'm behind you on the 7th hole."
Young man walks into a bar
Orders 6 shots of tequila.
Bartender says: " what are we celebrating?"
Young man says; " my first blow job"
Bartender says; " well here's a 7th shot on the house"
Young man's says: " if 6 ain't going to get the taste out, 7 won't"
A private eye recounts one of the cases he's worked in: "From the moment I saw her outside my office window, I knew she was in big trouble."
"Mainly because my office was located on the 7th floor."
On October 31st, we will have a full moon, and the 7th planet from the sun will be its brightest...
So when someone sees the moon that day, they will likely see Uranus too...
Who won the original Tour De France?
The 7th Panzer division
Guy goes into a pub.
He orders 7 pints of beer, he drinks the first pint, the third pint, the 5th and the 7th pint and gets up to leave. The barman says why are you not drinking the other three pints.? He says, doctors orders, what do you mean by that asks the barman.? I am on medication and my doctor said to me the odd pint is okay.
Young man in a bar
Asks the bartender for "6 shots of Jager."
The bartender happily pours the shots and asks, "are you celebrating anything?"
The young man responds, "yeah my first blow job." Excited the bartender pours a 7th shot and says, "here have one on the house."
The young man shakes his head and says, "no thanks, if 6 doesn't get rid of the taste nothing will."
Congrats to the Patriots on their 7th ring,
Super Bowls XXXVI (2001), XXXVIII (2003), XXXIX (2004), XLIX (2014), LI (2016), LIII (2018), Prostitution Ring (2019)!
Why did Tupac go to the gym?
To get a sixpac!
(Thank you 7th grade me)
Who won the Tour de France on May 10th, 1940?
The 7th Panzerdivision
In 7th grade we had a quiz where we were asked "what did France set up during the French Revolution." They marked me wrong and I'm still a little upset about it.
I still maintain "tons and tons of guillotines" is a correct answer
I gifted trampoline to my son on his 7th birthday
I think he was so happy he bust into tears. He cried so hard that he fell out of his wheelchair
Got something to celebrate?
A guy enters a bar and orders 6 bacardi coke's. Bartender asks if he has something to celebrate. ''Yes!'' says the guy, ''I had oral sex for the first time!''
Bartender: ''Nice, congrats! The 7th is on the house then!''
The guy: ''No thanks, if the taste sticks after 6 drinks, it wil after 7 as well ...
Why couldn't the Lutheran math student steal the answers from his classmate?
According to 7th commandment, it was considered an ✓((1/2 i e^(-i x) - 1/2 i e^(i x))^2 )...
What's the difference between falling from the seventh floor and falling from the second?
7th floor:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHH
...
*thud*
2nd floor:
*thud*
...
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH
Sorry.
I was at a performance of Beethoven's 7th, when suddenly the whole orchestra got up and left.
...which was disconcerting.
7
One night I was dreaming the number 7, over an over. To my amazement, when I woke up it was 7 o'clock, on July the 7th. So I took the bus on line 7 straight to the racetrack and bet 7777$ on the 7th horse from the 7th round. It finished on 7th.
The woman was on the verge of death she asked her seven children to leave the room, and she was left alone with her husband.
She said to him I have something to confess.
Yes?
You know our 7th child, Little Joe?
He's not mine?
No, he is yours.
How to kill worm in your stomach
Eat apples for 6 straight days and on the 7th day eat an orange instead , then the worm will come out of your stomach and ask " dude where's my apple???" then you take a baseball bat and beat him to death.
Why are Americans so slow to celebrate 07/04?
I mean, it was the 7th of April months ago...
Who won the first Tour de France?
The 7th Panzer Devision
Why did 2Pac go to the gym?
To get a 6Pac!
-7th grade me
Islam IS a RACE
to the 7th century.
Only possible with the mind of a 7th grader...
My brother comes home from school one day and tells me his friend was held after school.
I asked him what for.
He said he moved all the women's rights books in the library into the fiction department.
Why do Russians celebrate Christmas on the 7th of January?
Cause eight reindeer and a sleigh are a lot quicker than 6 pigs and a stoneboat.
Call me the 7th noble gas.
Cuz I'm Og.
(yay for the completion of the 7th row of the periodic table!)
What is the name of the new game show hosted by Katt Williams?
Are You Stronger Than A 7th Grader?
Did you hear about the guy that was half Black and half Japanese ...
... every December 7th he would attack Pearl Bailey.
One of my friends maintains that tomorrow doesn't come until you've have 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep.
He also maintains that it's September 7th, 1998.
Then there was the Japanese grunge rocker...
Every December 7th he attacked Pearl Jam.
Seeing a repost is like going to war with China
It makes you go, Hey, thats the 7th time I've seen that guy today!
The new Super Smash Bros comes out on December 7th
Japan must just love dropping bombs that day
What did I do when I impregnated my 7th wife?
Iran
A Proton sits in a bar and orders his 7th drink. The barkeep asks "you sure?"
And the Proton replies
"Yeah man, I just caught my wife cheating, I need to forget...".
Who was the true winner of the 1940 Tour de France?
The 7th German Panzer Division
The last time Japan upset a nation this much was December 7th, 1941.
My teacher
In 7th grade my teacher walked in , took a long pause , then looked at all of us and said, "Never get married".
A man was eating the 7th planet from the sun.... what did his breath smell like?
83% hydrogen, 15% helium and 2% methane.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the 7th life puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working 7th arabia piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.
