The Best 35 72 Virgins Jokes

Following is our collection of funny 72 Virgins jokes. There are some 72 virgins jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these 72 virgins puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest 72 Virgins Jokes and Puns

I don't see why you would become an Islamic fundamentalist suicide bomber on the off chance that when you die you get 72 virgins.

Just become a Catholic priest and get them now.

I've never really understood it why would you become an Islamic suicide bomber on the off-chance you might get 72 virgins when you die.

Become a Catholic priest and get them now.

So I heard that the hackers "Anonymous" are waging war on ISIS and al-Qaeda...

Quite ironic that 72 virgins will be attacking the terrorists!

So, Anonymous has declared war on ISIS

... ironic that 72 virgins are now attacking the terrorists

A suicide bomber went to heaven.

The Angel at the front desk greeted him.

"Hi, welcome. There are 72 very horny virgins waiting for you!"

"I knew it! said the bomber. "Bring me the women!"

The Angel smiled.

"Who mentioned women?"


why would you be a suicide bomber...

And wait for the 72 virgins in heaven... When you could become a catholic preist and have them now!

Source: Jimmy Carr

A Muslim is about to commit suicide when a Catholic priest stops him

"What are you doing?!" Exclaims the priest

"There is nothing on this Earth for me." The Muslim says "I will commit suicide to go to paradise and get 72 virgins!"

The priest shakes his head

"Foolish Muslim, suicide is not the way!" He says

"Follow me, Ill take you to the local primary school."

You don't need to die as a muslim to get 72 virgins

Just be a catholic priest

A suicide bomber goes to heaven to receive his 72 virgins...

But all he sees are other men just like himself.

Confused, he asks one of them where his virgins are.
The man replies, "Brother, we are all virgins."

What's the difference between a Mormon man and a Muslim man.

A Mormon man gets 72 virgins and THEN kills himself.

Islamic terrorists makes no sense . Commit suicide and might get 72 virgins ?

Become a Catholic priest and get them now

You can explore 72 virgins reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean 72 virgins dad jokes. There are also 72 virgins puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Why do so many Muslim students take Intro to Engineering?

They heard it was a great place to find 72 virgins.

So the Hacker group Anonymous just declared war on ISIS and Al-Queida

Quite ironic that terrorists will be killed by 72 virgins.

Don't become an Islamic suicide bomber for the off chance you'll get 72 virgins after death.

Become a Catholic priest and get them now!

An al-Qaeda suicide bomber carried out his mission...

And made it to heaven, where he found 72 virgins. Turns out they were all guys playing world of Warcraft.

Did you hear anonymous declared war on ISIS?

A: Kind of ironic that they're now being attacked by 72 virgins

Can you imagine getting 72 virgin when you go to heaven?

The first half-dozen or so will be nice, but after that, I'm going to want a pro.

A jihadist was preparing himself for his mission, when suddenly he's facing the image of his dearly departed comrad

"Ahmad! How is paradise?"

"Abdul, don't go through with the mission, it is not the paradise we were promised!"

"How is that possible? How could that be? Did you get the 72 virgins?"

"Yes, and that's the problem, Abdul... think about what kind of women dies a virgin."

Islamic men get 72 virgins when they die. What do Islamic women get?

73 sets of clothes to wash.


After killing himself and several others, a suicide bomber is given 72 virgins to use as he pleases.

When the suicide bomber arrives, he notices that they're all on laptops. He finds this strange, and asks one what they're doing. The virgin responds, "We're playing Fortnite. Wanna join?"

How many virgins does take to change a lightbulb?

Obviously more than 72, or all those suicide bomber would have seen the light.

I don't understand why Islamic fundamentalist suicide bombers go through with it on the off chance of getting 72 virgins when you die...

Become a catholic priest and have them now!

Whoever says that it would be great to die and have 72 virgins...

Has obviously never had sex with a virgin

Why didn't Jimmy Savile want to be a Muslim?

He didn't need to die in order to get his hands on 72 virgins.

Why do you never see Old Suicide Bombers, after all they have less to loose?

Because A man who hasn't had a hard on in 10 years, has no use for 72 virgins.

What do you call it when a plane with 72 virgins crashes into a field?

Heaven on earth.

Why do Muslim Leaders tell their followers that they'll get 72 virgins in Heaven?

Because 69 looks too obviously a joke.

Suicide bombers make no sense

You blow yourself up and then get 72 virgins but if you become a priest you get them immediately

I want to name my new band "In search of 72 virgins".

That way people will just automatically assume we are the bomb.


What is the point in becoming an ISIS terrorist on the off chance you will get 72 Virgins when you die?

Just become a Catholic priest and have them now.

What Do You Call a Bearded Man Whose Idea of Paradise is 72 Virgins?

Richard Branson.

A Muslim and a Catholic priest walk into a bar.

The two start talking casually about their respective religions. The Muslim says, "I believe that when I die, Allah will bless me with 72 virgins."

The priest's eyes get wide. "Really? That would be awesome, but unfortunately the church can only have 3 altar boys at a time."

After dying, an Islamic Terrorist goes to a gaming room in heaven.

He looks around and finds 72 older dudes gaming. These weren't the virgins he was expecting.

72 virgins

This was it. The suicide bomber was going to blow up the US camp. Little did he know that when he woke up he would be surrounded by 72 engineering students....


Why do suicide bombers have 72 virgins?

one for each chunk.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the 72 virgins jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working 72 virgins piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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