JokoJokes

50th Anniversary Jokes

27 50th anniversary jokes and hilarious 50th anniversary puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about 50th anniversary that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Quick Jump To

Funniest 50th Anniversary Short Jokes

Short 50th anniversary jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The 50th anniversary humour may include short 25th anniversary jokes also.

  1. Wife: Honey, what will you give me for our 25th anniversary? Husband: A trip to Paris. Wife: Wow! That's wonderful! How about for our 50th? I'll pick you back up.
  2. I took my wife to Hawaii for our 25th wedding anniversary. You know what I did for our 50th? Went back and got her.
  3. last weekend was my grandparents 50th wedding anniversary So we threw them a g**....
  4. A couple is being interviewed for they 50th marriage anniversary Journalist: In fifty years of marriage you never though about a divorce?
    Wife: h**..., yes. Divorce, never!

Share These 50th Anniversary Jokes With Friends




50th Anniversary One Liners

Which 50th anniversary one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with 50th anniversary? I can suggest the ones about fifty years old and 20th anniversary.

  1. What did the Cookie Monster get on the 50th anniversary of the Muppets? diabetes.

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about 50th anniversary can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of 50th anniversary puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Uproarious 50th Anniversary Jokes to Share with Friends

What funny jokes about 50th anniversary you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean turning 50 jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make 50th anniversary prank.

An Old Couple Sat Down To Eat Breakfast

Wife: Honey, do you know what today is?
Husband: I believe it is our 50th wedding anniversary.
Wife: Thats right. Do you remember what we were doing right now 50 years ago?
Husband: We were sitting at this very table, eating breakfast n**....
Wife: Thats right. Want to do it again?
Husband: Sure.
*both remove clothes and sit back down*
Wife: Honey, my b**... are as hot as they were 50 years ago.
Husband: Yes they are, one is in your coffee and one is in your oatmeal.

A 70 year old man buys his wife a present

For their 50th wedding anniversary a 70 year old man buys his wife a see through night gown
The next day he goes back to the store and returns it
Cashier: I'm sorry you were unsatisfied with our product. May I ask what was wrong with it?
70 Year Old Man: It was all wrinkled

The air hostess comes to know that the old married couple is...

flying to Hawaii on their 50th marriage anniversary.
She asks them how it feels to be married for so long.
The old man replies: "It all felt like 5 minutes..."
The air hostess was about to reply on the profoundness of what he said, when he earned a slap from the old lady for his next word:
"...underwater".
--Taken from All in a day's work; Reader's digest

Reason for longevity - Ma and Pa are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary.......

they are sitting on a bench side by side and Ma says: "I'm getting tired, are you?" And Pa replies: "That's okay, honey, I'm getting tired of you too."

Key to a successful marriage

A couple was celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. The husband was asked what was the secret to their marriage. He replied, When we first got married, we agreed that I would make all the big decisions and she would make all the small decisions. So far it's been all small decisions.

A couple celebrating their 50th anniversary had many well wishers stop by to congratulate them.
After all of their guest had left, the two settled into recliners.
“Mother,” the man said, “our marriage is tried and true.”
“What’s that you say?” she asked. “You know I can’t hear without my hearing aid.”
“I said, our marriage is tried and true,” he repated, a little louder.

A man grows tired of his relationship with his wife

On their 25th anniversary, the man planned a vacation trip.
Man: Let's go on a vacation, just the two of us.
Wife: (gets exited) Really? Where are we going?
Man: How about an adventure in the jungles of Africa?
Wife: That would be really nice! What about on our 50th?
Man: I'll come back for you.

50th Anniversary Tour

This year, 60s rock group The Byrds will be embarking on a tour of the United States for the 50th anniversary of their formation. The band announced that former President George Bush will be joining them on stage for several of their songs, however, Bush will be playing both guitar and keyboards in order to cut costs. This just goes to show that a Bush in the band is worth two of the Byrds.

It was a couples 25th anniversary

The husband told his wife, "im taking you to china!" the wife then asked what they would do for their 50th anniversary to which he responded "thats when i will pick you up!"

An Asian couple are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. After a wonderful dinner with family and friends they're back home reminiscing when the wife suddenly turns to the husband with an eyebrow raised suggestively and says "Since it our 50th anniversary, tonight we do whatever you want."

"Anything?" he asks. "Anything!" she replies. The man thinks for a long time then gives her a devilish look and says, "I want 69." The wife looks bewildered. "You want Beef & Broccoli now?!"

Wedding anniversary

A couple goes out to dinner to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary.
On the way home, she notices a tear in his eye and asks if he's getting sentimental because they're celebrating 50 wonderful years together.
He replies, "No, I was thinking about the time before we got married. Your father threatened me with a shotgun and said he'd have me thrown in jail for 50 years if I didn't marry you.
Tomorrow I would've been a free man! "

An older couple on the morning of their 50th wedding anniversary

An older couple is sitting down to breakfast on the morning of their 50th wedding anniversary. The wife says "Honey, we were wild and crazy when we were newlyweds. What do you suppose we were doing on the morning after we were married 50 years ago?"
The husband says "We were probably sitting around n**... at the breakfast table."
"Why don't we do that now? You know...for old times sake?" says the wife. The husband agrees and they both s**... and sit back at the table.
The wife leans over and says "Honey, my n**... are as hot for you now as they were 50 years ago."
The husband says "Of course they are. One's in your oatmeal and the other's in your coffee."

A man and a woman have just had their 50th wedding anniversary. The husband turns to his wife and asks, "What do you want to do to celebrate our anniversary dear?" She replies, "Let's run upstairs and make love." He turns to her and says, "Well make up your mind, we can't do both!"

Italian Anniversary

At the church's husbands' marriage seminar, the Priest asked Luigi, on his upcoming 50th
wedding anniversary, to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he managed to
stay married to the same woman all these years.
Luigi replied to the audience "Well, I've-a tried to treat-a her well, spend-a the money on her, but-a, da best-a is-a dat I took her to Italy for the 20th-a anniversary!
The Priest immediately commented, "Luigi, you are an amazing inspiration to all the husbands here! Please tell the audience what you are planning for your wife for your 50th anniversary."

Luigi proudly replied, "I'm-a gonna go and-a get her."

A married couple go golfing every year for their anniversary.

During their 50th anniversary outing, the husband says, "Honey, I love you very much but I have to be honest with you. Early in our marriage I had an affair. It was strictly s**..., and it ended quickly."
His wife smiles and forgives him, but after a couple holes says, "Since we're confessing old transgressions, I should tell you that before we were married... I was a man."
The husband pauses, then becomes furious. He throws his hat to the ground, turns beat red and paces around. Finally he says, "You mean to tell me I've let you tee off from the women's tee all these years for nothing!"

Old couple celebrates their 50th anniversary

An old couple celebrates their 50th wedding anniversary in their home.
Just think," the old man says, "we were sitting here at this same breakfast table, n**... as jaybirds, 50 years ago."
Well," the old lady snickers, "what do you say, should we get n**...?"
The two immediately s**... to the buff and sit back down at the table.
You know, honey," the little old lady says slyly, "My n**... are still just as hot for you as they were 50 years ago."
I'm not surprised," replies the old man. "One's in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal!"

50th Anniversary Gift

At their 50th anniversary, the wife decides to give the husband a very special gift. She said, as a gift, I'll give you a chance to ask me anything and I'll tell you the truth.
Husband see's a chance. He said, you know, it's about Adam. I have always wondered about him. He doesn't look anything like our other 6 children. I was always suspicious about him. I think I may not have been fair to him as well because of this. I have to ask you, does he have a different father?
Wife pause for a second. then says: yes.
The husband feels sad, but still asks, who?
The wife replies: you.

A special 25th anniversary.

A husband and wife are eating dinner together, and the husband says "Honey, I came up with something for us to do on our 25th anniversary coming up next month." Surprised, his wife asks "Really?! I can't believe you remembered it, let alone have a plan for us!" The husband smiles at her and says "I'm taking you to Hawaii!" The wife was completely dumbfounded, they had never gone away on a vacation like that. She started to tear up and responded "Oh, that sounds absolutely amazing!". "And can you guess what I have planned for our 50th anniversary?" He asks her. She shook her head 'no', as she was still too shaken up to speak. He just smiles and says "I'm going to come pick you up."

a nice Italian couple . . .

At St. Peter's Catholic Church in Toronto, they have weekly husbands'
marriage seminars.
At the session last week, the priest asked Giuseppe, who said he was
approaching his 50th wedding anniversary, to take a few minutes and
share some insight into how he had managed to stay married to the
same woman all these years.
Giuseppe replied to the assembled husbands, 'Wella, I'va tried to
treat her nicea, spenda da money on her, but besta of all is, I tooka
her to Italy for the 25th anniversary!'
The priest responded, 'Giuseppe, you are an amazing inspiration to all
the husbands here! Please tell us what you are planning for your wife
for your 50th anniversary?

Giuseppe proudly replied, " I gonna go p**... her up."

An elderly man walks into a bar

He hears the other patrons discussing marriage. "My wife and I will celebrate our 50th anniversary next week," he proudly tells them. "That's wonderful," one of the others says, "What's your secret for a long and happy marriaige?" "Well, you've got to do nice things for her," he explains. "Such as what?" the others ask. "Well, for example for our 25th anniversary I took her to Ireland." "That is nice," they others agree. "What are you doing for your 50th?" "Going back to visit her."

At St. Peter's Catholic Church in Toronto , they have weekly husband's marriage seminars.
At the session last week, the priest asked Giuseppe, who said he was approaching his 50th wedding anniversary, to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he had managed to stay married to the same woman all these years.
Giuseppe replied to the assembled husbands, "Wella, I'va tried to treat her nicea, spenda da money on her, but besta of all is, I tooka her to Italy for the 25th anniversary!"
The priest responded, "Giuseppe, you are an amazing inspiration to all the husbands here! Please tell us what you are planning for your wife for your 50th anniversary?"
Giuseppe proudly replied, " I gonna go pick her up."

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these 50th anniversary jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.