45th Jokes

What happens when you take a joke too far?

The 45th President of the United States of America.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all on their way to heaven

One day, a blonde, brunette, and a redhead were on their way to heaven.

God told them that there were 1,000 stairs to reach heaven, and on every stair he would tell them a joke. If they laughed, or even just smiled, they would not make it into heaven.

The redhead managed to make it to the 45th step before laughing.

The brunette reached 200 and cracked a smile.

The blonde made it all the way to the 999th step and burst out in laughter before God had even told his joke.

"Why are you laughing when I haven't even told my joke yet?" God asked the Blonde.

"I just got the first one!" she answered.

On day a redhead, a brunette, and a blonde were on their way to heaven.

God told them the stairs to heaven were 1,000 steps and on every step he was going to tell them a joke.

If they laughed they would not be able to get to heaven.

So the redhead made it to the 45th step and laughed.

The brunette made it to the 200th step and laughed.

But the blonde made it to the 999th step and laughed even before god told his joke.

God asked "Why did you laugh I haven't even told the joke yet"

The blonde said "I know I just now got the first one!!!"

Two guys were staying at a hotel on the 45th floor

Please excuse formatting, I'm on mobile.

As they were checking in, the receptionist said that the elevator was broken and that they could have a room on the first floor. The guys said that they would take the stairs and for the first 15 floors, they would sing songs, the next 15 floors they would tell funny stories and the last 15 floors would be sad stories.
So they start the walk, singing songs for the first 15, telling funny stories for the next 15, and finally, the reach the 30th floor and one guy says to the other, what's your sad story?
The guy responds, I don't have the room key

Who was the 45th Vice President of the United States? [Warning: Gore]

45th birthday

Two weeks ago was my and I wasn't feeling too good that morning. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!" and probably would have a present for me.

As it turned out, she didn't even say good morning, let alone any happy birthday. I thought, well, that's wives for you, the children will remember.

The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and despondent.

As I walked into my office, my secretary Janet said, "Good morning, Boss. Happy Birthday." And I felt a little better that someone had remembered.

I worked until noon, then Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me."

I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day."Let's go!" We went to lunch.

We didn't go where we normally go; instead we went out to a private little place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.

On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?"

I said, "No, I guess not." She said, "Let's go to my apartment."

After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable".

She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake -- followed by my wife, children, and dozens of our friends, all singing Happy Birthday.

And I just sat there --on the couch -- naked.

Who is the 45th president of the United States?

The answer is a no-brainer!

Dear Media,

You're Fired!

Sincerely,
President Donald J. Trump
The 45th President of the United States of America

We have essentially Elected 4chan for the 45th president of the United States.

This is a day that will go down in Infameme.

Anyone who thinks Mcgregor beating Mayweather is impossible...

.. forgot Donald J Trump is our 45th President

It's time everyone accepts that Donald Trump...

...is America's 45th greatest president.

/credit to Judah Friedlander

What's better than being the first Black President of the United States?

Being the 45th white one.

I was so mad when I heard the 45th US President was rude to the Royal Family!

Then my friend reminded me what the 1st US President did to them.

Who served as the 45th Vice President of the United States?

We have collected gags that can be used as 45th pranks to have fun with. If you want to stand out in a crowd with a good sense of humour joking about 45th, here are one liners and funny 45th pick up lines.

Joko Jokes