420 Jokes
80 420 jokes and hilarious 420 puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about 420 that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This collection of 420 jokes, featuring puns and light-hearted humour, will keep you laughing for hours! With the book marking the 80th anniversary of the first French 420 joke, there's something for everyone to enjoy. Get your copy to find out why everyone's talking about these 69/420 wit and punchlines!
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Funniest 420 Short Jokes
Short 420 jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The 420 humour may include short french jokes also.
- I celebrate 4/20 on January 5th... Because I know how to reduce fractions unlike the rest of you morons.
- Today, in honor of 4/20, I'm letting my entire custodial staff partake before they come to work. It's the only day I'll tolerate high maintenance people.
- A lot of baking instructions say 425°F But I always do 420° just to make it a little cooler.
- In honor of 420 Police Officer: "How high are you?"
Pothead: "No officer, it's "Hi, How are you?" - Today I saw a license plate that said 420-fps Their is no joke I just want to share something cool but I have no friends
- I always save my eBay shopping for after I come back from 4/20 That way I'm always the highest bidder
- Saw on twitter Don't worry if you missed 4:20 guys just smoke at 4:22 because it is 4:20 too
- On a scale of 1-10 how high was Carl? 420
- 420 is a gateway holiday to harder, more serious holidays.
- Drunks like 4/20, too. It's a fifth.
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420 One Liners
Which 420 one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with 420? I can suggest the ones about infinity and page.
- If you ever miss 4:20 just wait untill 4:22 because... 4:22 is 4:20 too.
- How did Elon Musk celebrate 420? With SpaceX going up in smoke.
- A friend of mine and I were both born on 4/20. We always have a joint birthday party.
- Don't worry if you missed 4/20 Because today is 4/20 too!
- If you miss the alarm for 4:20, wait for 4:22... Because 4:22 is 4:20 too.
- I celebrate 4/20 On 1/5
Simplify your fractions! - Did you see gas finally hit $4.20 It's pretty high
- Everybody : 4/20 Me as an intellectual : 1/5
- Don't worry if you miss 4:20 Just wait 2 minutes as it is 4:22
- When midgets celebrate 4/20... Do they get high, or just get medium?
- It's okay if you missed 4/20 Because today's four-twenty-too
- A couple decided to get married on 4/20. It was a 'joint' decision.
- Ben has 911 candies. He eats 420. What does he have now? Diabetes.
Ben has diabetes. - Happy 4/20! What do you mean yesterday?
- What do the french call 4/20? 80
Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful 420 Jokes
What funny jokes about 420 you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean number jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make 420 pranks.
So today is 4/20
4/20 is national w**... day, 4/21 is national surprise drug test day and 4/22 is national unemployment day
4/20 It's h**...'s birthday today...
... I guess that brings a whole another meaning to "Smoking a J"
My gay friend told me he's spending this 4/20 with his boyfriend.
He said, "After all, the Bible says 'Two men who lie together shall be s**...'."
My friend told this to me the other day, so I apologize if this is a repost or anything like that.
A man is pulled over for speeding.
Police Officer: Sir, were you aware you were going 68 MPH on a 45?
Man: No sir.
Officer: Well, you were, and that's far too high. You'll have to be in court.
Man: Well, can you at least raise the number a bit so we can get the judge to say it?
Officer: I guess I can.
\*In the courtroom
Judge: How were you going 420 on a 45?!?
A man, his wife and the hotel receptionist
Man: Hello, I'am in room 420. Please send someone over immidiately. I'am having an argumemt with me wife and she wants to jump from the window.
Receptionist: Iam sorry sir but thats personal matter.
Man: Listen you dumb f*c**..., the window is not opening and that's a maintenance problem!
Why did the cows go to the m**... field?
It was the p**... calling the cattle back.
In honor of 420.
If Jesus died on 4/20, he wouldn't have been crucified....
he would've been s**... to death
Celebrating 4/20
So today was 4/20 and me and my buddy met up to smoke one. After a lot of arguing and persuading we couldn't decide whose w**... we should roll up first.
In the end we just decided on a joint venture.
Today is 4/20 and we all know what that means -
Happy birthday, Adolf h**...!
Why did the mathematician celebrate 4/20 on January 5?
Because he knows how to reduce fractions.
Meme numbers: 69, 420 and...
The OG number: 5318008 ;)
What did they call the Minecraft player who built a clock in-game to chime at 4:20?
A Redstoner.
Today is h**...'s birthday.
Kinda gives a whole new meaning to "4/20 blaze it."
My two best friends were born on 4/20...
They have a joint birthday party
It's ok if you missed 4/20.
4/22 is 4/20 too.
Since today is 4/20, remember kids, drugs are never the answer
They are the question, and the answer is yes!
That awesome moment when you realise...
...in 2020 it will be 4/20 for a whole month.
What happens on 420 in Saudi Arabia
A lot of people get s**...
Louis Vuitton bag
Why is it that a French woman never managed to sell a $80 Louis Vuitton bag in the US?
She kept saying it's $420.
12:00 PM on 4/20...
It's high noon
If you smoke p**... and forgot what day today is, don't worry. You can celebrate again on the 25th of May.
Because 4/20 = 5/25
What's Snoop Dogg's new cooking show called?
420 Braise It
For me, it's 4/20.
For others, it's 2/10.
Sometimes it's even 1/5.
My Ex told me she had a creeper
I spent over 420 hours watching her house, I still haven't found him
What an eventful day!
It's 420, Hitlers birthday, and the 18th anniversary of the columbine shooting. Boy what a fun day
My Christmas tree is on a timer
It lights up everyday at 4:20
What do you eat on 4/20?
p**... pie
Guys I didnt miss the m**... smokeouts last Friday
Because today's 4/20 two
4/20?
More like 1/5.
Always reduce your fractions... always.
I've heard about lighting up on 4/20...
but I feel like BP took it a bit far back in 2010.
Imagine it was 420 degrees Fahrenheit outside
We be all baking!
What do cows that are stoners say?
420 graze it
Two candles wanted to get high…
They lit up and got low instead.
Happy 4/20!
Adolf h**... was born on 4/20....
That idiot got caught up in the wrong gas
Why is Top Thrill Dragster 420 feet tall?
Because you get high really fast
Friday was 4/20
But Sunday was 4/22.
what do stoners and skinheads have in common
they both celebrate 4/20
How much should I drink on 4/20?
Roughly a fifth?
Why don't french stoners celebrate 420?
Because they're to busy celebrating 80!
You know you're an engineer when....
You hear 4-20 and think they're talking about an analog current input
4/20 is National w**... Day...
4/21 is National Drug Inspection Day
4/22 is National Unemployment Day
What's the highest number there is?
420
