Following is our collection of 2016 jokes which are very funny. There are some 2016 happy jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these 2016 usain puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
I guess we'll just have to call them the Ts.
Some time passes after the 2016 US Presidential election, and Barack Obama passes away from old age. He gets bored after a while in heaven, and asks God if he can return to Earth for a while to see how the good ole' US of A is turning out. God agrees.
Obama returns to Brooklyn, and walks into a bar, ordering a beer. He asks the barkeep "How's the country? How are foreign affairs? Any problems currently being faced?"
"Oh, nothing at all, sir. We're an empire now. We're successful."
"But what about Iraq and Afghanistan? Those were terrorist hotspots not too long ago?"
"We control it now. We're an empire. Everything is good."
"But what about Europe, Asia, and their financial crises?"
"That too has been taken care of. We are now finally an empire."
Pleased at the outlook of the country he once led, Obama asks the bartender for the bill:
"65 rubles, sir", replies the bartender.
Putin decides to invade Poland. But first, he wants to check the future situation in his country by visiting a fortuneteller.
Putin: Hello! I'd like to ask how much would a 0,7l bottle of vodka in Moscow 2016 cost.
Fortuneteller: Hmmm... it seems about twenty.
Putin: Rubles?!?
Fortuneteller: No, PLN.
Of all people, you would have thought he'd have 2020 vision
I mean, the last time a Clinton was a president, it left a really bad taste in her mouth.
Just to be sure I start 2016 on the right foot
The bartender looks up and says, "I'm sorry, we don't serve noble gases here."
Argon doesn't react because reacting has been copyrighted by The Fine Bros since 2016.
Due to this, 17 cashiers will lose their jobs.
The 2016 Olympics.
...but I can't decide between "eggshell", "beige", or "2016 Oscars".
2017: He can't do that... right?
2018: I hope my district wins the Hunger Games!
You can explore 2016 dysfunction reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean 2016 year dad jokes. There are also 2016 puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
I said, "Dude, it's 2016 you can use any printer you want."
Another sad day for the music industry in 2016.
It will be the first time that two presidents have had sex with each other
I said "It's 2016, Jamal, you can use any printer you want"
Hi! I've got 2 tickets for the final of Euro 2016 but forgot that it's on the same day as my wedding so I can't go.
If you are interested and want to go instead of me ...
... It's at St. Nicholas' Church, Brighton and she's called Jane.
When i'm pulled over, it's the quickest way to tell the Cop i'm white.
Catatonic
Is it really 2016? I mean Tarzan is playing in theaters, Pokemon is a craze, and a Clinton is running for President of the United States.
Monica Lewinsky is voting for Donald Trump in the 2016 Presidential Election, because the last time a Clinton was in office, it left a bad taste in her mouth.
I hope he holds our flag high.
The Olympic competitors are qualified.
Half of the competitors cheat and the other half aren't qualified.
None of the North Korean athletes defected.
I am a passenger.
Instead you're supposed to say something like "Shawn, would you please paint that fence?"
2016: iPhone 7=no headphone jack
2017: iPhone 8=no battery
2018: iPhone 9=no screen
2019: iPhone 10=no phone at all, just pay Apple $1000
.. And a black Gentleman came over to me and asked where the coloured printer was. I replied "Man its 2016 you can use any printer!"
A black person asked where the coloured printer was. I said, "it's 2016 you can use any printer."
To which the clerk responds, "It's 2016 man. You can use any printer you want."
I don't know, but we'll find out November 8, 2016.
Honestly hurricane Matthew should run for president because I think he left the biggest mark on the country
In 2016, the Six Million Dollar Man consists of two hip replacements.
The pessimist says "It can't get any worse" and the optimist says "Oh yes it can!"
People would yell at me to get out of their country and I would get offended and feel attacked.
After election 2016, I just reply, "thanks for the concern! You should too!"
That's because I've got 2020 vision.
Sure showed them
2016: Trump doesn't stand a chance.
2017: Trump's still trying?
2018: "Hey, are you guys going to watch the hunger games tonight? I hope my district wins"
"Chill out guys, all of this was just a prank. I'm going for the 3rd term".
The year Brock Turner got sentenced to 3 months but America got 4 years.
"Americans are saying that in 2016, they will either have their first woman president, or their first insane president.
Like what's the big deal? Korea did both in one election cycle back in 2012"
2017 Anger
2018 Bargaining
2019 Depression
2020 Acceptance
1 for 2008, 1 for 2016
But even he could not survive 2016
...and is ending with the death of a Guerilla
The last time Democrats were THIS angry is when the Republicans took their slaves away
You could have got a phone call from Charlie Sheen.
(Morgan Freeman narration): 2016 would not, in fact, be anyone's year.
A 30 second ad on YouTube that you can't skip
Only 30 more to go and I'm there!
The 2016 best suicide bomber award goes to Mohammed.
Unfortunately Mohammed can't be with us tonight.
It blows.
(Get well soon Carrie)
Thanks 2016, you helped me achieve my goal and made me depressed and miserable.
(George Michael)
Wham! there's one more.
....is to accomplish the goals of 2016 which I should have done in 2015 because I made a promise in 2014 and planned in 2013
then WHAM!
I'm worried for when it's going to unlock nukes
It's like everyone and their mothers are dying.
^^sorry ^^not ^^sorry
"Celebrity Deaths of 2016"
\#4,562 will shock you!
Two thousand and sixteen
His family are taking it really hard.
Nine.
It claimed the life of Chuck Norris.
"Carlos Ray "Chuck" Norris (born March 10, 1940) is an American martial artist, actor, film producer and screenwriter died this morning in his house in Oklahoma at the age of 76. He is feeling much better now and has fully recovered from this minor annoyance."
One for 2008 and one for 2016.
On the stage.
Mariah Carey's live performance career
It's so 2016
Just like it was yesterday.
That way, I'll reach my goal of losing 20 pounds AND start 2017 off on the right foot!
On new years eve some parts of the world are in 2017, some are in 2016, and a large portion of the U.S. is still stuck in 1940.
Teacher: Eh, no. Those weren't trains, they were *bandwagons*, and they didn't jump in *front* of them either.
I'd have one million dollars, unfortunately it would be in monopoly money because none of them are real.
He replied,"Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Deport him and you do not have to feed him again."
Trump 20:16
Oh sorry thought it was still 2016.
In 2016, they ate 73,432,384 bananas,
and only ate 6 monkeys.
"Well I hope they got the bronze."
Orange is the new black.
Who tells you about it first?
In 2017, celebrities touched people and their legacies died.
The 2016 election.
People warned me, that if I voted for Hillary Clinton it would be the end of civility and truthfulness in the US as we know it, the deficit would skyrocket, and there would be never ending investigations of the president.
Well, I voted for Hillary and that was what happened!
Super Bowls XXXVI (2001), XXXVIII (2003), XXXIX (2004), XLIX (2014), LI (2016), LIII (2018), Prostitution Ring (2019)!
Robert Kraft:
- 2001 Super Bowl Ring
- 2003 Super Bowl Ring
- 2004 Super Bowl Ring
- 2014 Super Bowl Ring
- 2016 Super Bowl Ring
- 2018 Super Bowl Ring
- 2019 Prostitution Ring
That was hilarious, wasn't it.
This is a running joke.
2009. Ox
2010. Tiger.
2011. Rabbit.
2012. Dragon.
2013. Snake.
2014. Horse.
2015. Goat.
2016. Monkey.
2017. Rooster.
2018. Dog.
2019. Pig.
2020. Rat.
2021. Ox.
All served with rice or chips, bat and pangolin scale sauce £1.00 extra.
2014 Didn't jog
2015 Didn't jog
2016 Didn't jog
2017 Didn't jog
2018 Didn't jog
2019 Didn't jog
2020 Still not jogging
This is a running joke.
I would have totally believed you.
After what happened in 2020, i didn't get the chance to, but 2021 will be the year.
~~After what happened in 2019, i didn't get the chance to, but 2020 will be the year.~~
~~After what happened in 2018, i didn't get the chance to, but 2019 will be the year.~~
~~After what happened in 2017, i didn't get the chance to, but 2018 will be the year.~~
~~After what happened in 2016, i didn't get the chance to, but 2017 will be the year.~~
~~After what happened in 2015, i didn't get the chance to, but 2016 will be the year.~~
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the 2016 party jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working 2016 president piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.