2015 Jokes

Following is our collection of happy humor and blue one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include 2015 puns for adults, dirty mph jokes or clean open gags for kids.

There is an abundance of buy jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 48 funniest jokes on 2015. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any man witze you can hear about 2015.

The Best jokes about 2015

Sex Ed in 2015

Remember kids, 'Netflix and Chill' is only one "D" away from 'Netflix and Child.'

My black friend asked me where to find the color copier

I said it's 2015 and he can use whatever copier he wants to

In 1466, Dracula started eating 16-year-old virgins.

In 2015, he died of starvation.

Jogging

2014 Didn't jog

2015 Didn't jog

2016 Didn't jog

2017 Didn't jog

2018 Didn't jog

2019 Didn't jog

2020 Still not jogging



This is a running joke.

Caitlyn Jenner won Woman of the Year on 2015

Proving that even when men are women they're better at it than women are.


2013: Didn't jog - 2014: Didn't jog - 2015: Didn't jog - 2016: Didn't jog - 2017: Didn't jog - 2018: Didn't jog - 2019: Didn't jog - 2020: Still haven't jogged

This is a running joke.

So I was in the library the other day...

My black friend comes over and ask me where the color printers were at. I looked up and said "it's 2015 man you can use whatever printer you want".

I'm kinda terrified for 2015

2 + 0 + 1 + 5 = 8.
The EXACT number of nipples Hitler would've had if he had 6 more nipples!

Marvel Cinematic Universe just announced their newest addition to their 2015 film that will be released in 2019 starring a transgender hero.

Auntman

TIL that in 2015 Gerald Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald became one of the first ever same sex couples to get married in Ireland.

They're perfect for each other because Gerald Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald.

My 20/15 eyesight is really helpful during tough economic times...

because a lot of jobs require minimum supervision.


Three men walk into a car part store...

I need taillights for a Mustang the first one says. What year? the employee asks. 2015 he answers. There you go , the worker hands in the parts. The second guy goes to the counter, saying I need a steering wheel for a Mustang . What year?
1997 he answers. There you go . After he payed, the third guy comes to the counter. I need rear suspensions for a Mustang . There you go .

A recent survey asked 12 year old's what was their best accomplishment in 2015.

87 percent of them answered "your mom"

Muhammad Ali in 1974: Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee

Floyd Mayweather in 2015: Run like a chicken, hug like a bear

A recently retired man decides to buy his dream car

A brand new 2015 Chevy Corvette. As he's leaving the dealership with his new purchase, he decides to open it up on the road and see what his car can do. He's flying down the road at about 130 mph when he sees the red and blue sirens behind him trying to keep up. He pushes the pedal to the floor, knowing he'll be able to easily out run them. After a few moments, he begins to realize he's too old for this and had better just pull over to avoid any trouble.

The officer, visibly irritated, walks up to the window of the corvette.

"If you don't give me one good reason why you didn't stop as soon as you saw my sirens, I'm taking you in for reckless driving."

The man pauses for a moment and looks up at the officer
"Well sir, I'll be honest. Ten years ago my wife up and left me for a police officer without any warning. And well, I thought you were bringing her back."

The officer tipped his hat and let him go with a warning.

2015 was an odd year

It will all even out this year though

My wife said that I need to pay more attention to what's going on around me.

So, in 2015, I'm going to try harder.

I found a bug in Madden 2015

I sacked Tony Romo, and he didn't break his collarbone.

Did you know that humans eat more bananas than monkeys?

In 2015 humans consumed 65 million tons of bananas and only 8 monkeys.


My goal for 2017....

....is to accomplish the goals of 2016 which I should have done in 2015 because I made a promise in 2014 and planned in 2013

Using a pencil to vote in the 2015 General Election...

As safe an option as letting Jimmy Saville volunteer in a Kids Hospital.

And your 2015 Miss Universe is Columbia!

-Steve Harvey

It's 2015. Bill Clinton is whipping up celebrity endorsements for Hillary with a Halloween party. He invites his friend, Arnold Schwarzenegger and suggests they go as dead presidents for the media. Too cliche says Arnie. What about dead musicians. Great idea. I'll be Coltrane. What about you?

I'll be Bach.

I took a taxi home

As we welcome 2015, I would like to share a personal experience with my friends about drinking and driving.

As you know, some of us have been known to have brushes with the authorities from time to time, often on the way home after a "social session" with family or friends.

Well, last night, this happened to me. I was out for an evening with friends and had more than several beers followed by a couple of bottles of rather nice red wine and a few vodka shots. Although relaxed, I still had the common sense to know I was slightly over the limit.

That's when I did something I've never done before - I took a taxi home.

Sure enough on the way there was a police roadblock, but since it was a taxi they waved it past and I arrived home safely without incident.

This was a real surprise to me, because I had never driven a taxi before. I don't know where I got it, and now that it's in my garage I don't know what to do with it.

So, anyway, if you want to borrow it give me a call.

Now that it is 2015 we should all really be on the lookout for Marty Mcfly.

If it is only to forewarn him to invest heavily in Parkinsons research on his return to 1985.

A black guy in the library just asked me where the colored printer is...

It's 2015 dude, use whatever printer you want.

Two bears and three bears walk into a bar.....

They ask for oil price from 2015 through 2017.

How did Marty McFly react when shown what 2015 would really look like?

Gee, it's hard to say, although he did seem pretty shaken up about it.

What's the difference between 2015 and Moore's Law?

One's the year of the ram, the other is the ram of the year.

In 2015, while addressing graduates of SMU, George W. Bush said;

"To those of you who received honours, awards and distinctions, I say well done. And to the 'C' students, I say you, too, can be president of the United States."



Then Donald Trump came and said Bush has denied us, Americans our right to be POTUS!

Did you hear about the attempted shooting at the 2015 PokΓ©mon World Championship?

The gunmen tried to escape, but luckily, officers were able to catch'em all.

Apple more profitable than Samsung still in 2015

Guess you could say they definitely out cell the competition.

Imagine us waiting for 2016 and all of sudden comes 2015 s

I'll admit I didn't appreciate the direction NFS 2015 was heading towards.

when they headed to the city there was a lot of traffic

You know Juul was founded in 2015...

So some of you need to stop hitting 5 year olds.

My Black friend asked me..

If there was a colored printer in our hotel. I told him its 2015 and he can use whatever printer he wants.

What do you call a gay couple before June 2015?

Partners in crime

My New Year Resolution of 2016

Is to achieve my goals of 2015

Which I had should have done in 2014

And promised in 2013

And planned in 2012

And to remember to write 2017 instead of 2016

And the father of the year 2015 award goes to..

Year 2014!

I heard this in 2015.

I hate when someone asks me where I see myself in 5 years. Like come on, I don't have 20/20 vision.

Summing up things about this year

2015: I am officially THE WORST YEAR EVER!



2016: Hold my beer.

chinese new years

2009. Ox
2010. Tiger.
2011. Rabbit.
2012. Dragon.
2013. Snake.
2014. Horse.
2015. Goat.
2016. Monkey.
2017. Rooster.
2018. Dog.
2019. Pig.
2020. Rat.

All served with rice or chips, bat and pangolin scale sauce Β£1.00 extra.

The biggest joke of 2015..

When you have Donald Trump, Hilary Clinton, and Deez Nuts running for President.

Having sex often keeps your memory sharp.

With that, I wish you all a productive 2015!

Just Announced : Indianapolis Colts are going to Super Bowl XLIX (2015)

As tickets to the event are now available on StubHub.

Best Ultimate Fails and Funny Compilation March 2015 part 1

I'm not worried at all about this Ebola crisis.

I've just purchased the new 2015 edition of Norton Antivirus. Feeling pretty smug.

PUNJABI STAGE DRAMA 2015

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes