The Best 32 2013 Jokes

Following is our collection of 2013 jokes which are very funny. There are some 2013 correctly jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these 2013 esv puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny 2013 Jokes and Puns

By legalizing Cannabis and same-sex marriage we finally interpreted the bible correctly:

**"A man who lays with another man should be stoned."** [Leviticus 20:13 esv]

Edit1: a typo

Edit2: thanks for the gold humorous stranger!

The Bible says being gay is fine, as long as you're high.

"A man who lays with another man should be stoned."

- Leviticus 20:13 ESV

My prediction for December 21, 2012

Many babies will be born on September 21, 2013

It all makes sense now, gay marriage and marijuana being legalized on the same day...

Leviticus 20:13 - "If a man lays with another man he shall be stoned"

We've just been interpreting it wrong all these years.

If I had more than one kid, I'd call the second kid ...

... etcetera.

- Marilyn Manson in his 2013 interview with Larry King.

I've just won the 2013 'Most secretive person' award.

I can't tell you how much it means to me.

Study finds Washington state residents consumed 175 metric tons of pot in 2013 (real news)

As a result, the state is changing it's slogan to "Whoa Dude."

Two Laws in the Torah were fulfilled on the same day.

For those who haven't heard, Washington State recently passed two landmark laws: "Gay marriage" and The fact that gay marriage and marijuana were legalized on the same day makes perfect biblical sense because Leviticus 20:13 says:

'If a man lies with another man, they should be stoned.' We just hadn't interpreted it correctly.

Here's hoping 2013 is the year in which I finally fix the bugs in my new time machine.


Kahn Noonien Singh has appeared in Star Trek from 1967 to 2013, spanning many generations of viewers.

This is an example of a "Long Kahn".

Did you hear about the band 2013 megabytes?

Of course you haven't, they haven't had a gig yet.

You can explore 2013 typo reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean 2013 bible dad jokes. There are also 2013 puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

I didn't have fun at the Boston Marathon this year ...

back in 2013 it was a blast.

Why couldn't the NSA protect their information during 2013?

They were Snowden

"What do you think about the End Of The World in 2013?"

Bullshit. I Have a Can of Tuna that will end in 2015

My goal for 2017.... to accomplish the goals of 2016 which I should have done in 2015 because I made a promise in 2014 and planned in 2013

Happy New Years 2013!

Hey guys I'm sending this through Internet Explorer, hope you guys had a great 2012!

My New Year Resolution of 2016

Is to achieve my goals of 2015

Which I had should have done in 2014

And promised in 2013

And planned in 2012

And to remember to write 2017 instead of 2016

The last time there was this big a mistake involving an Oscar...

... was Valentines Day, 2013.

Since assuming the title in 2013, Pope Francis has visited more than 27 countries.

I guess he really is a roamin' Catholic.

By legalizing marijuana we understood the Bible correctly.

"A man who lays with another man should be stoned." [Leviticus 20:13 esv]

By legalizing Cannabis and same-sex marriage we finally interpreted the bible correctly:

"A man who lays with another man should be stoned." [Leviticus 20:13]

Did you know that in 2013 there was a Russian scientist named Povandolakoviviscov kintayionshinkov

Why did you skip the name? I will not complete the story.

The Bible says it's okay to be gay

So long as you're high

Leviticus 20:13 "If a man lies with another man he should be stoned."


Legalizing gay marriage and marijuana at the same time now makes perfect Biblical sense.

Leviticus 20:13 says: "If a man lies with another man they should be stoned. Apparently we just hadn't interpreted it correctly before!

Tell me

"Tell me when you've come," I panted to my wife as I pumped away.

"2007 and twice in 2013." she said.

I'm sorry

In 2013 Steven Hawking said God didn't exist

In 2018 God said Steven Hawking didn't exist

The Kinsey Institute studies suggest that frequent sex is linked to better memory.

May the year 2013 bring you warmth, love and light to guide your path to a positive destination.

A man is planning his vacation,

As he does so, a friend swings by and offers to help:
-Hey man, may I suggest the Maldives? Had an amazing time there.
-I'm not taking any advice from you! Back in 98, you suggested Rome, I went there and my wife got pregnant, in 2007 you suggested Brazil, I went there and my wife got pregnant, then, in 2013 you suggested France, and, guess what? My wife got pregnant, again!
-Well that's not my fault! You should just start taking your wife with you!

Me: Dude, I can't believe that 2017 was 7 years ago.

Friend: What do you mean, 7 years ago is like 2013..

Me: That's why I ain't believing it.

2013: Didn't jog - 2014: Didn't jog - 2015: Didn't jog - 2016: Didn't jog - 2017: Didn't jog - 2018: Didn't jog - 2019: Didn't jog - 2020: Still haven't jogged

This is a running joke.

chinese new years

2009. Ox
2010. Tiger.
2011. Rabbit.
2012. Dragon.
2013. Snake.
2014. Horse.
2015. Goat.
2016. Monkey.
2017. Rooster.
2018. Dog.
2019. Pig.
2020. Rat.
2021. Ox.

All served with rice or chips, bat and pangolin scale sauce £1.00 extra.

By legalizing Cannabis and same-sex marriage we finally interpreted the Bible correctly:

**"A man who lays with another man should be stoned."** [Leviticus 20:13 esv]

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the 2013 man jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working 2013 stranger piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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