2012 Jokes

Following is our collection of vatican humor and young one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include 2012 puns for adults, dirty philosophy jokes or clean boys gags for kids.

There is an abundance of cop jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 24 funniest jokes on 2012. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any naked witze you can hear about 2012.

The Best jokes about 2012

Dear JUSTIN BEIBER haters...

Dear JUSTIN BEIBER haters*
I owe my life to justin.
On march 9th, 2012 I was in a coma for 6 months after a terrible car crash.

One day my nurse turned the radio to Justin's song, So I got up and turned the radio off.

Happy New Years 2013!

Hey guys I'm sending this through Internet Explorer, hope you guys had a great 2012!

Rorschach's Joke

**Rorschach's Journal August 24, 2012**

I heard a joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life is harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world. Doctor says, "Treatment is simple. The great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go see him. That should pick you up." Man bursts into tears. Says, "But doctor... I am Pagliacci." Good joke.

**Everybody laugh. Roll on snare drum. Curtains.**

I was very naive sexually

My first boyfriend asked me to do missionary and I buggered off to Africa for six months

- Hayley Ellis, 2012


The Dark Knight (2008) The Dark Knight Rises (2012) Congratulations, Barack Obama.

Trump and Obama having a private conversation in 2012

Trump: Mr. Obama, out of sheer curiosity, what must I need to do in order to be elected President of the United States?

Obama: President?? You have to be stupid, ignorant, probably delusional to think you can be qualified to be the President of the United States!

Trump: Perfect, I will see you on your way out then.

Obama: What???

My wife and i have been happily married for two years

2012 and 2017

A joke from Korea

"Americans are saying that in 2016, they will either have their first woman president, or their first insane president.

Like what's the big deal? Korea did both in one election cycle back in 2012"

You know a movie which was ahead of its time

A movie about 2020 named 2012 came out in 2009

I can't wait

I can't wait to watch that one movie 2012. If I'm with kids, I'll say yeah, I remember that. I barely survived. I'm glad we rebuilt.

The concept of global warming was created by and for the Chinese in order to make U.S manufacturing non-competitive...

Donald Trump, 2012.

Judge Dredd (2012) is a Movie About a Mass Suicide.

Suicide by cop.

This "Kony 2012" is something else...

I haven't seen this many white people interested in whats going on in Africa since Mufasa died.

In hindsight it's easy to see that 2012 wouldn't be the end of the world.

The end of the world had 2020 vision.

I hate it when people mention forgetting about their 2017 problems.

I'm coming into 2018 with 2012 problems

My New Year Resolution of 2016

Is to achieve my goals of 2015

Which I had should have done in 2014

And promised in 2013

And planned in 2012

And to remember to write 2017 instead of 2016

The elbow

A man is complaining to his friend: "My elbow really hurts. I think I need to see a doctor." His friend answers: "Dude, this is 2012, in the supermarket they have a new computer that can diagnose much faster and cheaper. Just place a urine sample in the machine and it says what's wrong, and that only for $1!"

The man decides to take a shot, fills a glass with urine, goes to the supermarket, finds the computer and pours his urine into the computer. Immediately a small paper is printed and comes out of the computer: "TENNIS ELBOW. Keep your arm warm for a few days and avoid heavy lifting. In two weeks you'll be better."

The former scriptkiddie is impressed and decides to see if he can confuse the computer. He mixes dishwashing water with diarrhea from his dog, together with some urine from his wife and daughter. To finish it he masturbates and drops his sperm into the cup and mixes everything again.

when he arrives in the supermarked he drops his mixture into the computer. The computer spits out a little less small paper: "Your tap water contains too much calcium, buy softener. Your dog has parasites, give him medicines. Your daughter smokes marihuana, speak with her. Your wife is pregnant and you're not the father, get yourself a good lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better!

chinese new years

2009. Ox
2010. Tiger.
2011. Rabbit.
2012. Dragon.
2013. Snake.
2014. Horse.
2015. Goat.
2016. Monkey.
2017. Rooster.
2018. Dog.
2019. Pig.
2020. Rat.

All served with rice or chips, bat and pangolin scale sauce ยฃ1.00 extra.

How did the Black Death reach Europe?

The U.S. Olympic Basketball team went to the 2012 London Olympics.

If Obama had run against a cop in the 2012 Presidential Election...

He would have got beaten.

U know how the world was supposed to end in 2012 and it didn't and everybody was like haha silt Aztecs and their stupid calendar

Well has anyone felt alive since then?

Obama has suspended fundraising

Postby Jack Flash ยป Sep 22 2012
10:12:03 am
In light of Mitt Romney's recent
statements to the press, Obama has
Obama has suspended fund raising

In light of Mitt Romney's recent statements to the press, President Obama has decided to let Mitt Romney do his campaigning for him.

My prediction for December 21, 2012

Many babies will be born on September 21, 2013

The world must have ended in 2012...

Because have you actually felt alive since then

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes