1995 Jokes
20 1995 jokes and hilarious 1995 puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about 1995 that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest 1995 Short Jokes
Short 1995 jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The 1995 humour may include short plenty jokes also.
- I went to an Oasis gig with my sister in 1995. When they came out onto the stage I shouted, "Go Oasis!"
Then my sister left. - Nurse: You've been in a coma since 1995 Great! My Internet Explorer page should have loaded.
- What's the difference between a woman and a PC from 1995? A woman doesn't accept 3 1/2 inch floppies.
- There are so many scams on the internet now days. Send me $19.95 today and I can tell you how to avoid them.
- Robbery Yesterday, a Walmart manager was robbed outside of a gas station. Robbers took $19.95 of his money
- Hydrogen is a light, odorless gas, which, given enough time, turns into people. \- Edward Robert Harrison, *Smithsonian Magazine*, December, 1995.
- There are so many scams on the internet. It's hard to avoid them. Luckily I know how. Pm me $19.95 and I'll explain the details.
- Why didn't Monica Lewinsky get a tax return in 1995? Clinton was paying her under the table.
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1995 One Liners
Which 1995 one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with 1995? I can suggest the ones about frantically and navy.
- Rest in Peace Billy Mays. He partied like it was $19.95.
- What was the worst april fools day joke? Well logan paul was born in 1995.
- What did Thom Yorke name his 1995 Mercedes? The Benz
Quirky and Hilarious 1995 Jokes to Let the Chuckles Begin.
What funny jokes about 1995 you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean barbie jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make 1995 pranks.
1995: A Chinese Official is conversing with a Russian citizen...
...Chinese Official, "You have nothing in Russia."
Russian, "Oh yeah, we have Yeltsin."
Chinese Offical, "Then we will steal your Yeltsin.
Russian, "If you take Yeltsin you'll have nothing in China."
Disclaimer: This joke is not mine, it was told to my father during his stay in Russia in the year 1995.
I hate winter…
I hate the snow, the ice, the cold. In these times I think of the 4-man tent I bought on sale sometime around 1995. It's a basic tent, and it was a great value when I got it. It's hardly used now and just sits in my garage. I get such Winter Blues that I think about setting the tent up in the back yard, even though I've never gone through with that.
But alas I wonder, is this the Winter of my discount tent?
That's my plan and I'm sticking to it.
This is the transcript of a radio conversation of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October, 1995. Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations 10-10-95.
Americans: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a Collision.
Canadians: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.
Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.
Canadians: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.
Americans: This is the aircraft carrier USS Lincoln, the second largest ship in the United States' Atlantic fleet. We are accompanied by three destroyers, three cruisers and numerous support vessels. I demand that YOU change your course 15 degrees north, that's one five degrees north, or countermeasures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.
Canadians: This is a lighthouse. Your call.
Divorced Barbie
One day a father, on his way home from work suddenly remembers that it's his daughter's
birthday.
He stops at a toy store and goes in and asks the sales person, "How much for one of those Barbie's in the display window?"
The salesperson answers, "Which one do you mean?"
"We have, work out Barbie for $19.95, shopping Barbie for $19.95, beach Barbie for $19.95, disco Barbie for $19.95, astronaut Barbie for $19.95, skater Barbie for $19.95, and divorced Barbie for $265.95".
The amazed father asks: "Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.95 and the others only $19.95?"
The slightly miffed salesgirl rolls her eyes, sighs, and answers:
"Sir, Divorced Barbie comes with: Ken's truck, Ken's house, Ken's fishing boat, Ken's furniture, Ken's dog, Ken's computer, one of Ken's friends, and a key chain made from Ken's t**...."
Barbie Dolls
Ralph is driving home one evening, when he suddenly realizes that it's his daughter's birthday and he hasn't bought her a present. He drives to the mall, runs to the toy store, and says to the shop assistant, "How much is that Barbie in the window?"
In a condescending manner, she says, "Which Barbie?" She continues, "We have Barbie Goes to the Gym for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Ball for $19.95, Barbie Goes Shopping for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Beach for $19.95, Barbie Goes Nightclubbing for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $265.00."
Ralph asks, "Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.00 when all the others are only $19.95?"
"That's obvious," the saleslady says. "Divorced Barbie comes with Ken's house, Ken's car, Ken's boat, Ken's furniture..."
Heard this joke from a friend today!
Which Barbie?
Ralph is driving home one evening, when he suddenly realizes that it's his daughter's birthday and he hasn't bought her a present. He drives to the mall, runs to the toy store, and says to the shop assistant, "How much is that Barbie in the window?" In a condescending manner, she says, "Which Barbie?" She continues, "We have Barbie Goes to the Gym for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Ball for $19.95, Barbie Goes Shopping for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Beach for $19.95, Barbie Goes Nightclubbing for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $265.00." Ralph asks, "Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.00 when all the others are only $19.95?" "That's obvious," the saleslady says. "Divorced Barbie comes with Ken's house, Ken's car, Ken's boat, Ken's furniture..."
