18th Birthday Jokes
19 18th birthday jokes and hilarious 18th birthday puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about 18th birthday that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest 18th Birthday Short Jokes
Short 18th birthday jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The 18th birthday humour may include short turning 18 jokes also.
- So it was my 18th birthday the other day... Maybe now I can help my dad find those cigarettes he's been looking for the last 12 years.
- I bleached my hair on my 18th birthday. "I guess now you're legally blonde," my dad chuckled.
- What an eventful day! It's 420, Hitlers birthday, and the 18th anniversary of the columbine shooting. Boy what a fun day
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18th Birthday One Liners
Which 18th birthday one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with 18th birthday? I can suggest the ones about 21st birthday and aged 18.
- I got a picture of myself in a locket for my 18th birthday. I am now independent.
- I recently had my 18th birthday I'm now a dolt
- What did the black man get for his 18th birthday? Your car.
- Why did the student go to the s**... club on his 18th birthday? He wanted to study a broad
18th Birthday Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about 18th birthday you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean eighteen jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make 18th birthday pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A boy was born without a body
A boy was born without a body, no arms, no legs, he was just a head.
So for his 18th birthday his dad takes him the pub for his first pint. He takes a sip and BOOM - his body pops out. "Take another sip!" everyone shouts, then BOOM - his arms pop out. "Another!" everyone chants, so he takes another sip and his legs pop out.
The boy is really happy and he runs outside in excitement and he'**... by an oncoming truck and killed instantly.
"What a shame" his dad said.
"He should have quit while he was ahead"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I'm a good muslim
I had one drink of alcohol on my 18th birthday, and have been getting s**... since to repent.
A Girl Was About to Celebrate her 18th Birthday
The mother asked the girl what would she like as a gift.
As the girl was not materialistic, she said even a heartfelt message that will make her cry will suffice.
And the mother said "you're adopted".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Dad bought me an e**... for my 18th birthday!
I was a little disappointed when she turned out to be old, smelled terrible and was filfthy. She definitely had a ton of experience but she was very rusty.
I asked Dad to get his money back, I don't like Fords.
A divorced man was delighted when his daughter reached her 18th birthday
because it would be his final child support payment. Month after month, year after year he had paid, and now at last he would be free of the financial burden.
So he called his daughter over to his house and said: "I want you to take this last check to your mother's house. You tell her this is the last check she's ever going to get from me. Then I want you to come back here and tell me the expression she had on her face."
The girl took the check and returned a couple of hours later. "Well,' said the dad gleefully, "what did she have to say?"
The girl replied: "She told me to tell you that you ain't my dad."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An Italian mobster gives his son a Beretta for his 18th birthday. "Carry it everywhere" he says as he hands it to him.
The next day, the son comes home without the gun, but is sporting a brand new Rolex on his wrist. The father asks him:
"Sona, where is the guna I gave you"
"I traded it ina for a Rolexa" says his son.
"YOU STUPIDA FOOLA!!" yells his dad "One day you will hopefully hava wifa. Imagine coming homa and seeing her n**... in your beda with your best frienda. What are you gonna say, it's a quarter to sixa????"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Just a Head...
A boy is born without a body, only a head. For his 18th birthday his father, takes him to a bar for a drink.
The father orders his son a scotch and when the boy drinks it, an arm pops out of his head. He drinks another shot and another arm pops out. After the next shot a torso pops out. After more shots, suddenly, he has a whole body.
The boy runs out of the bar and gets hit by a truck, killing him instantly. A drunkard in the corner looks at the father and says, "He should have quit while he was a head."
Spaghetti.
A man has an affaire with an italian woman, and gets her pregnant by accident.
Because the man didn't want to hurt his reputation or his marriage he made a deal with the woman. He would financially take care of the kid from birth to the baby's 18th birthday if she would move to Italy and have the baby there.
The woman agreed, but she asked how the man would know when the baby was born. He told the woman to send a postcard with just the word "Spaghetti" when the baby was born and he would make sure to start sending money.
9 months go by and the mans wife comes inside and mentions a very strange postcard from Italy came in the mail for him and hands it to him.
The man reads the postcard and faints.
His worried wife picks up the postcard which reads "5x Spaghetti, 3 with meatballs and 2 plain. Send extra sauce."
(My apologies for any erroneous spelling and/or grammar.)