Uplifting 18 Daughters Jokes to have Hilarious Fun with Friends
The day my daughter turns 18, I'm going to buy her a locket, put her picture in it, and when she opens it tell her:
Well, I guess now you really are… independent".
The Tea Party
Mom went shopping, leaving Dad in charge of their daughter. Suzie was about 18 months old and loved playing with her new tea set. Dad was engrossed in the evening news when Suzie brought him a little cup of 'tea' (really just plain water).
He praised her good 'cooking,' so she brought him more. After several cups of 'tea,' and much praise, Mom came home.
"Honey, watch this," said Dad and had her wait in the living room as Suzie brought him another cup of tea.
"Isn't she just the cutest?"
Mom waited until he had polished off yet another cup of 'tea' before asking, "Did you ever think that the only place a baby can get water is the toilet?!"
My daughter turned 18 today, so I bought her a locket and put her picture in it. As I gently placed it around her neck, chocking back the tears, I said, "Well, sweetheart, I guess you really are..."
...independent!"
Late Night Political Jokes
"Happy birthday to Hillary Clinton, who turned 68 today. When asked what her favorite gift was, she said, 'Donald Trump.'" Jimmy Fallon
"They're talking about putting a woman on the $20 bill. And Hillary said, 'I'm available.'" David Letterman
"Chelsea Clinton gave birth to a daughter named Charlotte this weekend. Hillary Clinton was really excited until she remembered that you have to be 18 to vote." Seth Meyers
I got an all out groan on this one
My son turned 18 and moved out. We turned his room into a home school classroom for my daughters. My wife moved her printer in there and needed to print something a little while later.
Wife- "my phone can't find the printer"
Me- "did you tell it that it moved"
After 18 years of raising our teenage daughter as a proud Republican she has decided that she wants to become a Communist.
Well if that's the way she wants to be, then Soviet.
(Apologies if this has been posted before, I either thought of it or remembered it this morning on the toilet.)
I will never forget my daughter's words to me at her graduation.
"Wow dad.. After 18 years you decide to come back..."
If I ever have a daughter, i'm gonna name her Desire
And when she is 18, I'll kick her out of the house and when she asks why, I'll say "Because all suffering comes from desire".
