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150 Jokes

109 150 jokes and hilarious 150 puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about 150 that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

This article features the top 150 jokes for those feeling monstrously dejected. Featuring a mix of jokes for the whole family, from the lady to the Ford F-150 driver, these jokes will have you laughing out loud no matter the occasion- even Christmas!

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Funniest 150 Short Jokes

Short 150 jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The 150 humour may include short spot jokes also.

  1. Chinese takeout $15.00, gas to get there $1.50 Getting home to find they've forgotten one of your dishes.
    Riceless.
  2. Remember, as a child, when air for your bike was free? Now it's $1.50! I asked the gas station attendant why. He said "inflation"
  3. Do you remember when air was free at the gas station, and now it's $1.50? You know why? Inflation
    Holy smokes this blew up, THANK YOU all for the awards and the silver!!
  4. You're offered $50,000, but if you accept it the person you hate the most in the entire world will get $100,000. You taking it? Yes why wouldn't I want $150,000.
  5. Did you know that you can get a slice of lemon pie in cuba for $1.50 and in jamaica you can get key lime pie for $1.00? Those are the pie rates of the carribean.
  6. Had to stop at the gas station to fill my tires… They raised the price to $1.50. I just can't believe the cost of inflation these days.
  7. Tuna must age about five times faster than humans. This is supported by the fact that tuna half-hours are equal to 150 minutes.
  8. Whats the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts Beer nuts are $1.50 a lb. And deer nuts are under a buck.
  9. I've open 6 birthday cards and I'm up to $150 already. I love working for the post office!
  10. You know air used to be free at the gas station and now it's $1.50. You know why? Inflation

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150 One Liners

Which 150 one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with 150? I can suggest the ones about engineer and statistician.

  1. Why does it cost $1.50 now to put air in my tires? Inflation?
  2. Air used to be free at the gas station, now it's $1.50. Do you know why? Inflation.
  3. My wife broke her SatNav and wants $150 for a new one. She can get lost.
  4. I just lost 150 pounds of useless, life draining fat I got a divorce.
  5. Andy has 150 candy bars. He eats 125. What does Andy have now? Andy has diabetes
  6. Remember when air was free and now it costs $1.50? Do you know why? Inflation.
  7. What is the difference between a cow and slavery? U can't milk a cow for over 150 years
  8. If you are 150 lbs and drink 3 lbs of milk a day... You are literally 2% milk.
  9. Beer nuts $1:50 Deer nuts under a buck
  10. Why do they play techno music at the cancer clinic? It does 150 beats per minute.
  11. I thought Gord Downie would live to be 150! I guess I was ahead by a century.
  12. What's the name of a Korean cook book? 150 ways to wok your dog
  13. I lost 150 over the last few months I really need to stop going to British gambling sites
  14. Andreas Lubitz. Is the first German pilot to record 150 kills in 70 years.
  15. Did you hear about the 150 lb. man who had 75 lb. t**...? He was half nuts!

150 Calories Jokes

Here is a list of funny 150 calories jokes and even better 150 calories puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • You can burn up to 150 calories through one vigorous session of m**...... Still got me kicked out of my weight watchers meeting though.
  • b**... your head against a wall burns 150 calories an hour. It also gets you removed from your local gym.
  • Doctors say having s**... with a Woman burns 150 Calories... When I had s**... with a Woman, I too lost 150 calories- along with my keys, phone, wallet, and my wife...
  • b**... your head against a wall for one hour burns 150 calories. It also got me banned from the local gym.

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about 150 can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of 150 puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Fun-Filled 150 Jokes to Boost Your Mood

What funny jokes about 150 you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean suddenly jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make 150 prank.

A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads...

A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads:
Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
h**...: $10.00
He checks his wallet and beckons to the s**... bartender.
"Are you the one who gives the hand jobs?" he asks.
"Yes," she purrs. "I am."
"Well, wash your hands," says the man. "I want a chicken sandwich!"

Homosexuality is found in over 150 different species, homophobia is only found in two.

We aren't doing enough to exterminate the f**...-hating squirrel.

A young black Jew asks his father, "Dad, am I more black or more Jew?"...

"Why do you ask?" asks the Dad.
The boy says, "Well, a guy at school has a bike for sale for $150 and I can't decide if I want to haggle him down to $100, or just steal it."

A man walks into a bar, and begins reading the menu overhead the smoking hot bartender.

The sign reads as follows:
* Nachos $4
* Hamburger $3
* Hotdog $2
* Grilled Chicken Sandwich $3
* Grilled Cheese $2
* Fries, Onion Rings, and Tater Tots $1.50
* h**... $10
After he looks over the menu for a moment he asks the bartender, "Are you the one who gives the h**...?" "Why yes I am." replies the bartender seductively. Then says the man, "Wash your hands! I'd like a hamburger."

Stopped to put air in my tires today. The pump cost $1.50! I remember when those things used to only cost 25 cents.

Guess the price has adjusted for inflation.

A Japanese man walks into a currency exchange.

He gives the teller $100 CAD And receives $150 ¥ back.
He returns the following week to do the same thing. He gives the teller $100 CAD and receives $140 ¥.
He asks "I was in here last week, why am I not getting the same amount back?"
Teller replies, "Well, fluctuations."
The Japanese man says, "Oh yeah? Well fluck you white guys too"

A movie theater was robbed of $150 worth of candy

The thieves took 2 bags of M n' Ms and a small soda

A man visits the doctor

and then he meets a friend.
Friend: Whatsup, where you been?
Man: Ive visited the doctor
Friend: What did he say?
Man: 200 Dollars
Friend: Yeah, but what do you have
Man: I have 50 dollars
Friend: I Mean whats the problem?
Man: 150 dollars
I m not sure if it makes any sense in English, but i tried

A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads:

Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
h**...: $10.00
He checks his wallet and beckons to the s**... bartender.
"Are you the one who gives the hand jobs?" he asks.
"Yes," she purrs. "I am."
"Well, wash your f**...' hands," says the man. "I want a cheese sandwich!"

Went to the psychiatrist today…

She told me I have a split personality and charged me $150.
I gave her $75, and told her she can get the rest from the other idiot!

The teenager lost a contact lens while playing basketball in his driveway. After a brief, fruitless search, he gave up. His mother took up the cause and within minutes found the lens.

How did you do it? he asked.
We weren't looking for the same thing, she explained. You were looking for a piece of plastic. I was looking for $150.

Meet your newest employee. My salary shall be 5000 bucks.

(TKZS = a state-run c**... collective farm.)
A man walks in the TKZS' boss office and says: "Meet your newest employee. My salary shall be 5000 bucks."
The boss laughs straight at his face: "Comrade, the average salary here is 150 bucks. I don't make 500. Why would I pay you 5000?"
„Cuz I can talk to animals. Don't believe me? Let's walk around the farm.
They reach the cow, she says "Moo!" and boss asks cockily "What'd she say?"
„She said she gives 30 litres of milk daily. She also says you and the mayor split 10 litres between you and book only 20. The boss looks a bit worried now and says „Come with me, I wanna show you the pigsty. They get there, the sow says „Oink! and boss waits for our guy's answer.
„Piggy says she gave birth to 6 piglets, but you and the mayor got one each, and booked only 4.
TKZS boss sizes up our guy and then says „Welcome aboard, let's go sign the papers.
They make their way to the office building and while they pass the goat, the goat goes „Meeh!
Boss says „Don't listen to her. Me and the mayor were a bit drunk.

Chinese takeout

Chinese food to go $15. Gas to go pick it up $1.50. Getting home and realizing they forgot one of my containers.... Riceless.

Can't take that chance

A man and his ever-nagging wife went on vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker
told the husband, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in the Holy Land, for $150." The man
thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.
The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and
you would spend only $150?"
The man replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take
that chance."

Joyriding in a Lamborghini

*joyriding in a Lamborghini*
HER: No way this thing does 150
ME: Only one way to find out *puts on glasses*
*pulls over and checks Wikipedia*

A man and his ever-nagging wife are on vacation in Jerusalem

While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker told the husband, "you can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in the holy land, for $150.
The man thought about it, and finally decided he would have her shipped home.
The undertaker asked, "why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife home when you can have her burried here for so much less?"
The man replied, "Long ago, a man died here, was burried here, and three days later, he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance."

An American man visits the Holy Land...

An American man visits the Holy Land with his wife and mother-in-law. Sadly the mother-in-law died. When seeing the local Israeli undertaker, it was explained that they could ship the body home for $5,000. But if they buried her locally it would cost only $150. The man said to the undertaker "We'll ship her home." The undertaker asked "Are you sure? It's an awfully big expense and we can do a very nice burial here." The man replied "look, 2000 years ago they buried a guy here and three days later he rose from the dead. I can't take that chance."

Have you heard about the gynecologist who quit his job?

Yeah so he became a mechanic.
Went to school and for the first test, he had to disassemble then reassemble an engine.
He got a %150. He got confused and asked his teacher how he got that grade.
Teacher says, "I gave you %50 for taking it apart, %50 for reassembling it and running it smoothly, and another %50 because you did it all through the exhaust."

Guy walks into a bar...

There's a sign that says: Cheeseburgers - $1.50, Chicken Sandwich - $2.50, h**... - $10.00. He walks up to a very attractive barmaid and ask "Hey, are you the one who gives the hand jobs?" "Yes," she purred, "I am." He looked her straight in the eye and said "Well, go wash your hands, because I want a cheeseburger."

The bully loomed threateningly over the nerd and said, "You know what snitches get don't you?"

Ummm, "150 points?"

A mom tells her son to buy some vegetables

She says to bargain, and try offer the seller half the price
Son: Sir, how much does a bag of vegetable cost?
Seller: 8
Son: I will offer you 4
Seller: What about 6
Son: 3
Seller: Alright, I will sell it for 4
Son: 2
Seller: 3
Son: 1.50
Seller: Kid, you are bargaining too much, I might as well give you a bag for free.
Son: Give me 2 bags

Chillin'

While you are reading jokes on reddit, I am sitting here in a chair that costs $2,000, hugging a stuffed animal that costs $150 and watching the Ant Man Quantumania movie on a 100" full HD 8k TV that costs $8,000 and nothing bothers me, not even the look of the furniture store employees who apparently want me to leave the store.

An Australian man living by the cliff has prevent over 150 suicides, during the 50 years he has lived there...

... by shooting them himself.

Everyone's complaining about the price of gas but I just got gas for $1.50

It was from a Taco Bell...

fluctuations

This asian lady goes to a bank to exchange her currency into dollars. For 1000 yuans she gets about 160$.
A week later she walks in with a thousand more and this time she only gets 150.
Confused, she asks the teller " Why 10$ less this time?"
Teller says "fluctuations"
She turns to leave and says " Fluc you americans too..."

A doctor changes Careers.

A Gynecologist is tired of dealing with Insurance companies and decides to become an auto mechanic. He studies hard, and for the final, he needs to diagnose and rebuild an engine. He need an 80 to pass an become a certified Mechanic.
He takes test, and waits for his score.
He gets a 150 out 100. He calls the instructor to find out why he scored it that way.
The instructor says " Well you got 50 points for Diagnosing the issue correctly, 50 points for rebuilding the engine correctly, and 50 points for doing it all thru the exhaust manifold.

Going to be Emceeing my sister's sweet 16 birthday tonight. Do you guys know any good jokes?

Just some clean jokes because there will be family there also and about 150 people in total and I cant find any amazing ones online.
Thanks

It used to be free to fill your tires with air now it costs $1.50!

Now that's what you call inflation!

Mr. Johnson went to his doctor's office to have a physical exam done. The nurse asked, "How tall are you?"

"I'm about six foot two," said Mr. Johnson. The nurse measured him and found that he was only five foot six.
"How much do you weigh?" asked the nurse.
"Around 150 pounds." The nurse weighed him and found that he weighed 200 pounds.
Then she took his blood pressure. "Your blood pressure is incredibly high," she said.
"What do you expect?" sputtered Mr. Johnson. "Before I came here I was tall and thin. Now I'm short and fat!"

For our upcoming anniversary, my wife wanted something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in 3 seconds.

I bought her a scale.

Little Johnny was in math class

The class was learning subtraction with big numbers today, and the teacher decided to use money as the unit of measurement. Johnny hadn't been paying much attention, so the teacher called on him, "Little Johnny, if you start with $1000 and gave $150 to Lucy, $150 to Suzy and $200 to Brittany, what would you have?"
"Well I'd have $500 left over after a very expensive o**..., sir"

I think I cracked the overweight problem

# I think I cracked the overweight problem
Last week I weighed 150 pounds, I felt so miserable and was loosing all hope for my future. I couldn't think of a way to get over the shame. Then it struck me and I figured out the ultimate way to get it over with. I immediately did what I had to do, I ordered a new weighing scale from Amazon. I was waiting this entire week for it to arrive. It finally arrived today. I just weighed myself, it's 69 now. I'm so proud of myself and the metric system.

A man would like to live 150 years

He goes to the doctor and asks if it may be possible:
The doctor asks : « Do you drink alcohol? 
- Not at all.
- Do you do drugs ?
- Never ever!
- Do you have numerous s**... partners?
- No. »
The doctor then looks the man deep in the eye and asks: « then why the h**... do you want to live 150 years?? »

Pricey Pies

Did you know a pork pie in Aruba costs $1.50? A cheese and spinach pie will cost you $2.60 in Barbados. An apple pie is only $1.30 in Jamaica whereas a pecan pie will set you back $3.50 in Grenada.

And those are the pie rates of the Carribean.

Morris had died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Morris' Last Will and Testament.

Morris had died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Morris' Last Will and Testament.
"To my dear wife Esther, I leave the house, 150 acres of land, and 1 million dollars.
To my son Barry, I leave my Big Lexus and the new Jaguar.
To my daughter Shirley, I leave my yacht and $250,000.
And to my brother-in-law Aaron, who always insisted that health is better than wealth, I leave my treadmill."

Sharp Retort

A young, beautiful woman gets into the elevator, smelling like expensive perfume. She turns to an old woman and says arrogantly, "Giorgio Beverly Hills, $100 an ounce!"
Another young, beautiful woman gets onto the elevator and also smells of very expensive perfume. She arrogantly turns to the old woman and says, "Chanel No. 5, $150 dollars an ounce!"
About three floors later, the old woman has reached her destination and is about to get off the elevator. Before she leaves, she looks both of the women in the eyes, farts, and says, "Broccoli, 49 cents a pound!"

What do the psychologist and the h**... say to each other after they spend the night together?

"That will be $150 please."

The clear coast

A married couple is in bed asleep when the phone rings at 2AM.
The blonde wife answers and listens for a second and then shouts into the phone, "How should I know that's 150 miles from here!!!"
At that the husband rolls over and asks "who was that?"
The wife replied, "I don't know, some dumb woman wanting to know if the coast is clear!"

A man is in a job interview..

"So it says here that you consider your memory to be one of your greatest strengths?"
"Absolutely."
"Could you give me an example of that?"
"An example of what?"

Today I got 150 Valentines cards, I was totally shocked and breathless

The security guard at Hallmark gave quite a chase!

man walks into lawyer's office.

"How much for a consultation?"
"Three questions for $150 bucks."
"Kinda steep, isn't it?"
"Yeah, now what's your last question."

TIL Humans are only capable of a maximum of 150 friends at one time.

Except for Dave: obviously.

Discussion between husband & wife

Wife : Everyday you spend 5 bucks on a pack of cigarettes. In a month, you would be spending 150 bucks right?
Husband : yes....and?
Wife : In a year, you would have spend $1800 and you have been smoking for 20 years. If you didn't smoke, you would be driving a Porsche by now.
Husband : how about you? Do you smoke?
Wife : Are you crazy? No! I don't!
Husband : And where is your Porsche?

So i used to work with a Muslim

This Muslim I was working with on a tower scaffolding lost his footing and slipped. I managed to grab his hand as he was dangling 150 feet in the air.
"Please, please," he begged, "don't let me drop!"
"Will you e**... bacon sandwich if I pull you up?" I asked,
"Yes! Yes! Of course I will!" he said.
So I let him go. I'm not having anyone steal my breakfast

A guy looking for work

A guy goes door to door looking for work. One homeowner hands him a brush and a can of paint and offers him $150 to paint his porch.
A few hours later, the guy comes back to the homeowner and says, I'm finished. But you should know that your car's a Ferrari, not a Porsche.

Why are deer nuts better than beer nuts?

Beer nuts cost $1.50 but deer nuts are under a buck.

I've lost 150 pounds since I moved to Europe.

I really shouldn't have left my wallet on the Tube.

An F5 tornado went through Arkansas last week...

It did $150 million worth of improvements.

Have you heard of the band 150 megabytes?

No? Not surprised, they don't have any gigs yet.

Jeff Bezos personal wealth grows to $150 Billion

He should simply change his spelling to
**J€££ B€zo$**

It's Amusingly hypocritical for my wife to get upset at me buying a $89 samurai sword

When she has no problem spending $150 on groceries.

What did the man say when he was offered 150 µg of MDMA?

Nothing.
He just rolled with it.

My wife is always asking for money

Two old Jewish guys are discussing their wives and how they spend so much.
"My wife is always asking for money." says o**.... "Yesterday she asked for $100. The days before $75. The days before that $150. It never ends."
"What does she do with all that money?" asked his friend.
"I don't know." said the first guy.I never give her any."

An explorer walked into a clearing and was surprised to see a pygmy standing beside a huge dead elephant. "Did you kill that?" he asked. The pygmy answered: "Yes".

"That's amazing!!," said the explorer. "How big's your club?!?"
The pygmy replied: "Oh, There's about 150 of us."

If you really think about it, it is 150% more likely...

...for someone to make up statistics rather than cite real ones.

My boss told me to file 100 pages of paper.

And i accidently did 150 pages.
What can i say i am an overarchiver.

TIL that the average person weighs 150 pounds, so a ton of people is about 13 people.

Now I know what my wife meant when she said she's slept with a ton of people in the last month.

150 people from a Catholic church walked into my restaurant 30 minutes before closing

For people who are against s**..., they were pretty hypocritical tonight.

I stepped on the scale today and I only weighted 150 lbs.

Not sure why the dial spun a full 360 before it stopped on 150 though.

What do you call 150 nuns in a shop?

v**... Megastore

jokes about 150

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these 150 jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.