149 Jokes

I got gas today for $1.49.

I couldn't believe it was that cheap. Then again, I don't know what else I expected going to Taco Bell.

The cost of dropping your phone on the floor

If you drop your iPhone on the floor the cost of getting the phone repaired is 149$.

If you drop your HTC on the floor the cost of getting the phone repaired is 200$.

If you drop your Nokia on the floor the cost of getting the floor repaired is 2000$.

SWEET PERFUME

A high class looking woman sat down next to me on the train. I took in a breath and asked aloud, 'What's that smell?'
She turned to me, looked down her nose and said, 'Chanel, 500 dollars an ounce." She turned away.
About 10 minutes later, I let out a silent fart. She turns to me and asks ,What's that smell?'
I say, "Broccoli, $1.49 a pound.'

A blonde, a burnette and a redhead are stranded on an island 15 miles from shore...

The burnette says "I have always been a very good swimmer, I will swim to shore and send help." She swims out 5 miles then drowns.

The next day the redhead says, "I was on the swim team in highschool, I know I can swim 15 miles, I will go get help." She swims out 10 miles and drowns.

The next day the blonde thinks "It's up to me to get help!" She swims out 14.9 miles, she can see and hear the people on the beach, but she gets tired and swims back to the island.

A Duck Walks Into a Drugstore

A duck walks into a drugstore and asks for a tube of ChapStick. The cashier says to the duck, That'll be $1.49. The duck replies, Put it on my bill.

Where can you get gas for a $1.49?

Taco Bell.

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Joko Jokes