Howlingly Hilarious 100th Jokes for an Unforgettable Evening
Grandpa's 100th birthday party was not a huge success.
The family wheeled him in his chair out onto the lawn for a picnic. When he slowly started to lean to the right, his daughter stuffed a pillow on his right side to prop him up. A bit later, he started leaning to the left. His son straightened him up and stuffed a pillow on his left side. Soon he started tilting forward. This time his other son caught him and tied a pillow around his waist.
A few minutes later, his grandson arrived. He said, Hey, Grandpa! How's life treating you?
Terrible, he said. They won't let me fart.
Two guys moving a futon to the 100th floor(this is a joke in my native language idk how good it can be translated)
Two guys moving a futon to the 100th floor.
At the 25th floor:
1st guy: T..th...
2nd guy: Tell me when we arrive
At the 50th floor:
1st guy:T..thi...
2nd guy: Tell me when we arrive we dont have time
At the 100th floor:
2nd guy: So what did u want to tell me?
1st guy:T..this is the wrong hotel
So a cop pulls over a guy for wearing his seatbelt..
tells the citizen that his captain gave him a 100 dollar bill to give to the 100th person he sees wearing their seat belt. The citizen looks a little confused, but of course, accepts the note, and proceeds to leave. The officer asks, " So, if you don't mind my asking, what are you going to spend the money on?" To a reply of, " yes, i do mind your asking, and frankly, i don't think its any of your business." The officer of course is stunned, but , as he goes to leave, the drivers objects. "If you must know, i'll probably spend it on getting my drivers license." The cop is taken aback, as the passenger says, " Oh don't listen to him, he's drunk." Shortly thereafter, a knocking comes from the trunk, and a muffled voice says, " are we over the border yet?"
edited for grammar nazis.
Today would have been Betty White's 100th birthday and a major snowstorm has hit the northeast US and Canada
I guess you could call this a Betty Whiteout
Even though we're nearing the 100th year anniversary of Buffalo Bill's death...
...can we still call it bison-tennial?
I got an escort for my grandpa's 100th birthday.
She said that she would give him super sex. He said "I'll take the soup."
People in China are all preparing to celebrate the 100th anniversary - and so should we!
Winnie the Pooh's birthday is August 21, 1921 which is only about a month off :)
Once upon a time, there was a boxer who always wins every single match...
When fans asked him what's his secret, he would just say, "I imagine there's a line on my opponent's face and I hit that line,". On his 100th boxing match, the whole world was watching. He lost. It was his first loss ever in his career. Fans again wondered so he was interviewed. A reported asked how come he lost this game. "Well, I carefully looked at the opponents face," he said, "and there's no punch line".
I participated in a poll..
It asked, "Do you consider yourself unique and special?"
99 people voted for yes.
I was the 100th who voted for no. I guess everyone is different, I am the only ordinary one.
The Queen Bee has up to 40 sexual partners a day.
Jay Z found his 100th problem then.
My Grandma died on her 100th birthday.
It was a real shame as we were only half way though giving her the bumps.
You can explore 100th communicate reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean 100th hundredth dad jokes. There are also 100th puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Yesterday I went on the 'Once in your lifetime Honeymoon' with my new wife...
The manager congratulated me on my 100th visit
In honor of Finland's 100th Birthday
How do you tell a extroverted Finn?
He looks at your shoes when he's talking to you.
