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100 Percent Jokes

16 100 percent jokes and hilarious 100 percent puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about 100 percent that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest 100 Percent Short Jokes

Short 100 percent jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The 100 percent humour may include short completely jokes also.

  1. I'm 100 percent against animal cruelty. Nothing makes me sadder than when my dog makes fun of me.
  2. Apparently 30 percent of under-6's in the U.S know how to use an iPad. Whereas 100 percent of under-6's in China know how to make one.
  3. Father(to son): Son, you should be getting 90 percent marks this time. Son: No Dad, I will get a 100 percent.
    Father: Don't joke with me.
    Son: Who started?
  4. Classmate: Why is that watet called 'smart' water? Me: Because it's 70 percent like me. If it was 100 percent like me It would be called brilliant water (and also would be a lot grosser)
  5. I named my kids after the place they were conceived Although I'm almost 100 percent sure i**... isn't mine.

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100 Percent One Liners

Which 100 percent one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with 100 percent? I can suggest the ones about percent and totally.

  1. You miss 100 percent of the shots you don't take -Jenny Mccarthy
  2. My contraceptive method is 100 percent effective. I just use my personality.
  3. I know 100% percent that God doesn't exist because I just asked him and he said so
  4. The cooks at McDonald's are guaranteed using 100 percent real beef 5 percent of the time
  5. What is 100 percent exactly 1 perdollar

100 Percent Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about 100 percent you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean absolutely jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make 100 percent pranks.

A man and his pregnant wife go to the hospital...

A man and his pregnant wife go to the hospital so the wife can give birth. After the nurses get her settled in, the doctor approaches the man and says, "We just got this new machine in that will transfer some of the pain of childbirth to the father. Would you like to try it out?"
The man says, "Well of course. Anything for my wife. Fire it up, doc!"
As the wife begins to have the baby, the doctor cranks up the dial on the machine to 25 percent. The wife screams in pain, but the man says, "I don't feel anything at all."
"That's odd," says the doctor. He adjusts the dial to 50 percent. The wife's screams grow quieter, but the husband still doesn't feel a thing.
"That's uncanny," says the doctor as he turns the dial all the way up to 100 percent. Neither the husband nor his wife feel any pain at all, the baby is delivered healthy, they're discharged from the hospital, they go home, and the mailman is dead on the porch.