0200 Jokes

Following is our collection of eat humor and buy one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include 0200 puns for adults, dirty bathroom jokes or clean sugar gags for kids.

There is an abundance of kevin jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 11 funniest jokes on 0200. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any irish witze you can hear about 0200.

The Best jokes about 0200

My wife said she wanted her birthday gift to go from 0-200 in less than ten seconds...

...so I bought her a bathroom scale.

Bob forgets his anniversary.

Bob woke up one morning to find his wife waiting for him in the kitchen, looking unusually angry.

"What's wrong dear?"

"Do you know what yesterday was?"

At that moment Bob realized that yesterday was his anniversary with his wife.

"Oh honey, I'm sorry how could I forget?"

"Well it doesn't matter. I want something that can go 0-200 in less then 60 seconds on the front yard tomorrow."


The next morning, Bob's wife woke up and couldn't find Bob. So she went out in the front yard. Greeting her was neither a car nor Bob, it was a small cardboard box. Perplexed, she took the box inside the house and opened it.



Inside was a bathroom scale.

Jokes I heard from a bartender.

My wife said that for Christmas, she wanted something that went from 0-200 in 6 seconds; so I got her a scale.


Did you hear about the 2 gay Irish men? Kevin Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzkevin.


So Hillary Clinton decides to have the talk with Chelsea. She asks if Chelsea is sexually active yet to which Chelsea replies, "Not according to Dad."

My fat girlfriend demanded that for her birthday I get her something in the driveway that goes 0-200 in 5 seconds.

Apparently a scale wasn't what she was thinking.

A man forgets his wife's birthday...

So his wife says to him "tomorrow I better wake up and there will be something with a bow on it that go from 0-200 in the blink of any eye."

The next day the wife wakes up and in the driveway is a big box with a bow on it. Excitedly she opens the box and much to her surprise all she uncovers is a scale.


For our 25 year anniversary, my wife asked me for a present that goes from 0-200 in seconds.

I got her a bathroom scale.

My wife told me she wants something that goes 0-200....

I told her to go step on the scale!

For my birthday I wanted something that could go 0-200 in 5 seconds or less. My wife said she had the perfect gift idea

A bathroom scale wasn't what I had in mind

A man is busy at work and forgets that it is his wife's birthday...

When he gets home, his wife is completely enraged. "I DEMAND THAT YOU GET ME SOMETHING THAT CAN GO FROM 0-200 IN 5 SECONDS OR LESS!". The man cowers under his wife and nods his head.
The next morning the man leaves early for work and puts a small package on the driveway. When his wife wakes up, she looks outside and sees the package. Confused, she grabs her coat and runs outside. She rips up the paper, expecting to see keys, but instead there is a weight scale.

The man has been missing for several days.

Jason's wife Liane wanted something that in 6 seconds goes from 0-200..

So he bought her a bathroom scale.

You're fat liane, don't sugar coat it. Because you'll just eat that too.

My wifes birthday

My wife asked me for something that went from 0-200 insanely fast.
Bought her a pair of scales


Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes