Funny Jokes and puns

Daily joke about shaky

shaky joke

Jokes of the Day for March 17th 2023

If I buy 8 bitcoins...

Does that mean I have one bytecoin?

A lone sniper was just about to assassinate Donald Trump.

Just at the last moment, one of the President's bodyguards spotted him.
He immediately shouted "Mickey Mouse, Mickey Mouse"
A shot rang out and Trump fell dead.
As his aides gathered round the body, one of them asked the bodyguard why he had shouted "Mickey Mouse"
'I'm sorry" he said "I meant to shout "Donald, duck"

What food makes women stop giving blow jobs?

Wedding cake

Whomever said laughter is the best medicine...

clearly hasn't tried curing diarrhea with a tickle fight.

A Canadian visits America and gets held at gunpoint by a stranger

The stranger says, "give me all your money and I'll let you live!"

The Canadian replies gleefully, "Oh! You must be what they call a doctor!"

The D.J. at a wedding reception yelled, "Would all the married men please stand next to the one person who has made your life worth living."

The bartender was almost crushed to death.

What do you get if you drop a piano down a mineshaft?

A flat minor

With relationships, they say there's plenty of fish in the sea...

But I'm just stuck here holding my rod

What's the difference between a burger, and a blow job?

You don't know?

Let's do lunch sometime!

As a couple gets into bed, the husband starts to rub and kiss his wife.

She turns over and says, "I'm sorry, honey. I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow, and I want to stay fresh." The husband sadly turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife. "Do you have a dentist appointment, too?"

Whatrestraunt is always full of white people?

Cracker Barrel

100 years ago everyone had a horse and only the rich had cars. Nowadays everyone has a car and only the rich have horses

Oh how the stables have turned

I went to a beekeeper to get 12 bees. He counted and gave me 13.

Sir, you gave me an extra. That's a freebie.

Yo mama so fat. . .

I swerved my car to avoid hitting her and ran out of gas.

Fight Club was awesome!

Hey guys so I found this Fight Club last night and had a blast! I showed up a little late so I missed some of the rules but I highly recommend it!

Joko Jokes